Sex Advice: Spanking - the stroke-by-stroke guide

Many people indulge in spanking but it is still considered taboo. If you want to indulge in a little slap-and-tickle here's how to do it right and do it well...

Don't even think about starting the session until they're fully aroused. The more erotically aroused they are, the more likely they are to be receptive to erotic pain. Stop spanking the minute their arousal level falls.

Run your fingers lightly over their buttocks, tickling them. Then place one hand on a buttock cheek, the other on the genitals. Start with the cheek closest to you.

Cup your hand slightly, keeping your fingers together and spank in a slightly upward motion. This feels better than a downward stroke. Keep your wrist flexible to begin with - experiment by holding it rigid a little further on.

Your first spank should be more like a caress than a slap. After you've dispensed it, massage the area for a few seconds and fondle the genitals.

Then try another spank, timing them to arrive no later than three to five seconds apart. Cover both cheeks, aiming for the lower, fleshier part and start to increase the force. Vary the pressure, frequency and placement of the slaps.

Later, try dispensing a spank, then holding your hand still on the skin for a second or so. Rub, stroke or lick the area for a further second, before giving another spank.

Alternate the spank of your hand with a different texture – a fur mitt, the back of a hairbrush. Or contrast the slap of spanking with, light, feathery strokes or kisses.

A vibrator held between her legs (by clamping her thighs shut) doubles the stimulation.

Use an ice cube to cool down the skin after a spank. Then lick or rub the area to provide the contrast of hot and cold.