"How do we join the mile-high club without getting caught?"
My partner and I want to join the mile-high club but how do you do it without getting caught?
Choose a night flight, where the cabin lights are dimmed and most passengers asleep. And be discreet - keep in-seat foreplay to hands under blankets and talking dirty in low voices so no-one clocks what you're up to when you both disappear.
Having decided on a signal of when to open the door, one of you disappears to the loo. The other waits a few minutes, then goes to stand outside the door, as though waiting for someone to come out. Wait for your moment, then knock and walk inside as usual.
While there, time is limited. One of you gets oral sex, or you lean forward over the seat, he enters from behind. You won't know if you've got away with it until you come out.
If there's someone waiting while the first person exits, you're busted - in which case, apologise, flash a cheeky grin and hope like hell they've got a sense of humour.