• "My boyfriend is big - are muscle relaxants safe to use for anal sex?"


    My boyfriend and I want to have anal sex and I have enjoyed it in the past. But it seems like the head of his penis is too big and any attempts have been very painful.

    I am considering using a muscle relaxant but as I don't know how this may affect my body, I thought it would check first to find out if they're safe.


    Your previous partner was clearly smaller than your current boyfriend, which made it easier to enjoy. It could be his penis is simply too big for your rectum - and if this is the case, you'd be silly to push it. Literally.

    Bottoms aren't really meant to have penises inside them - which is why any decent guide on how to have anal sex, includes advice on building up to the big one.

    I would strongly advise you to use a butt plug to 'train' yourself to accept your boyfriend. If this doesn't work, give up on anal intercourse and instead simply enjoy penetration with a finger, butt plug, dildo or vibrator.

    Anal creams that desensitise the anus are not your friend, neither are 'poppers' or cocaine. They all do a fantastic job of numbing the area but that's the problem.

    Pain is nature's warning. Yes I know that's something your mother would say but there is a right and wrong way to enjoy anal play and pain will tell you which path you're on.

    Fix your love life fast

    Comments (2)

    • Edmondo: February 26, 2010 17:13
      Hi Tracy,

      I am sorry but I don't agree with you regarding poppers. Desensitising creams and cocaine are not good as they just numb and you don't feel the pain....but poppers (a little) can be very usefull at first as it just helps relaxing the muscles which is exactely what you want to achieve naturally or with the help of poppers.

    • LoveHoney - Carly: March 02, 2010 08:56
      Hi Edmondo,

      I don't think Tracey was denying that poppers don't help to relax the anus, I think the point was that they have some quite awful side effects which you probably wouldn't want! Check out the Talk To Frank website for some more information: http://www.talktofrank.com/drugs.aspx?id=198

      Hope this information helps!
    Add a comment
    1. Yes, please! Email me when there are more comments after mine
    2. We need to ask you a question to prove you're a human because evil spam computers keep abusing our form!

    Ask Tracey Cox a sex or relationship question