• "My wife prefers to masturbate than have sex with me. What can I do?"

    Question:

    The other night I was really horny and initiated sex with my wife but she rejected me.

    I fell asleep but later woke up to find my wife masturbating in bed beside me.

    I feel upset and rejected by her preferring to do it herself when she could have had the real thing.


    Answer:

    I can understand how you would feel rejected and upset - you're right, she basically told you non-verbally she'd rather have sex with herself than you.

    One of several things is happening. First up, she might be feeling angry toward you and withdrawing sex as punishment. Or just confused with how she feels. How is your relationship? A sex problem is rarely just about sex.

    Secondly (and this one might hurt!) she doesn't find you sexually attractive anymore and would prefer to fantasise and masturbate to orgasm. It could also be, as much as she adores you, your actual technique is lacking and it's more reliable to DIY.

    Most women orgasm through oral sex or manual masturbation rather than intercourse. When you said you knocked back her advances did they include either of those or just intercourse?

    Finally, it could be something as complexly innocent as her not feeling like sex, then changing her mind later and choosing not to wake you up.

    All can be fixed by you having an honest conversation with her, trying not to have a knee-jerk reaction and making her feel comfortable enough to tell the truth.

    Heat up your sex life

    Comments (1)

    • Larry: August 11, 2017 12:40
      Well for over 10 years we have been primarily masturbating together. She uses two dildo vibes: one in inside and one on her clit and she has great orgasms. In fact better than when we used to fuck. I love watching her do this. She is so sexy and uninhibited doing it.When she's satisfied, she talks dirty to me while I whack off. We both really enjoy this kind of sex.
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