• Sex Advice: What to do if he loses his erection

    What to do if he loses his erection

    It's quite common for a man to lose his erection, but what can you do to help? And what should you avoid doing to make it worse? These are my best tips for reawakening his desire...

    • Get a grip! Women are timid around penises that aren’t very hard. We’ll grab onto it greedily when he’s stiff but switch to a nervous, tentative touch the second there’s any sign of softness. Do the opposite. If he’s only semi-erect, a firm grip and firm massaging will get him hard again.
    • Have your head in the right place! Losing an erection happens! It’s life, so isn’t a big deal. The better your attitude, the better his will be.

    • A soft penis is a lot easier to fellate because you can get the whole thing in there. A good, firm BJ can work wonders but do it slowly and sexily rather than sucking and pumping like some mad woman. Even a hint of desperation and all will be lost!
    • He doesn’t need to be fully erect to penetrate either – use your fingers to stuff him inside you and keep your hand down there to make sure it stays inside.
    • Massage his testicles as he thrusts slow and steady to start with and if you can reach, firmly massage the perineum (the smooth bit between his bottom and the testicles) with the pads of your fingers.
    • Keep the pressure OFF and let him know you’re completely unperturbed. If the relationship is new and he’s had erection problems in the past, could be he just needs time to feel comfortable with you.

    Send your love life to Sextasy

    Comments (2)

    • Daniel M: June 19, 2012 11:20
      I have found that if you have difficulty maintaining an erection, the worst thing is to pump and hold it roughly. It makes things worse. One very nice girl I was with was just a bit aggressive and did everything way too hard and fast. I tried to guide her as gently as possible, but her response was 'I know what I am doing' and pumped even harder. The end result - it went dead :-(. What probably didn't help was I was really anxious before to. After all, it had been 6 years since I had been intimate with someone.
    • Maria D: June 19, 2012 22:29
      Daniel M, that sounds like a not so good experience. Personally, I hate such people - they always think they know best and never accept anyone else's opinion.
    Add a comment
    1. Yes, please! Email me when there are more comments after mine
    2. We need to ask you a question to prove you're a human because evil spam computers keep abusing our form!

    Ask Tracey Cox a sex or relationship question