Sex Advice: How to find love after heatbreak
Clear the slate. Make sure you understand why your last break-up happened and have closure. Do you have any bad love habits or patterns you need to break? Break-ups are nearly always 50/50. Work out your part in it before going out there and making the same mistakes all over again.
Take it slowly. It’s hard to regain trust after your heart has been broken. Take it slowly and explain to new partners that you’re raw and vulnerable and will need lots of reassurance and time before you’re ready to commit. If they’re not prepared to be patient, move on. Genuine people will understand.
You don’t have to internet date. But you do need to accept dating is a numbers game. Internet dating exposes you to a lot of people at once – that’s why it’s successful. Get the same benefits by accepting every single invitation that will expose you to new people. The more new places you try and the more people you meet, the more chance you have of meeting the right partner. Resist the urge to stick to the same old haunts, hanging around hopefully. If you haven’t met anyone interesting the third time round, try somewhere new.
Single friends make dating a pleasure not a chore. Aim to build up a group of single friends initially, rather than get straight into looking for a partner. If you’ve got loads of friends to play with, you’ll lose that ‘desperate’ feeling that not only makes you miserable, it scares men off.
Everyone is not your ex. Just because your ex broke your heart or cheated on you or stopped loving you, doesn’t mean all men will. Every time you feel yourself panic that it’s all going to happen all over again, tell yourself ‘This person is not my ex.’ If the same thing does keep happening to you, the problem is your choice of partner. Take yourself off to see a counselor or read some good self-help books.