"How fast is too fast to come?"
I am trying to find a definition of what premature ejaculation is but I keep finding different answers. Could you clarify what it is and why I’m coming up with mixed results.
Most sex therapists don’t like to put a definition on what constitutes premature ejaculation because there really isn’t a set time period for lasting that you can measure yourself against. Some couples think premature ejaculation is him ejaculating after three thrusts, while others get miffed if he comes after 30 minutes. Some PE sufferers don’t make it to penetration at all and orgasm when they touch breasts. Others get a little further then blow it (sorry) on the very first thrust (which, let’s face it, is by far the most delicious on both ends).
The most accurate definition of PE, I think, is if you feel continually and constantly out of control when it comes to coming and don’t have the ability to delay orgasm. Professionally, the most widely accepted definition of PE is this: ejaculating always or nearly always within about one minute or less of penetration - and feeling bad about it. PE is as much about how you (or your partner) rate your performance as it is about how long you last. If you’re both happy with a minute or under of penetration, it isn’t a problem. In my experience from men I’ve counselled, most men who say they suffer from PE last anywhere between 15 seconds and a minute. This sounds worse than it is. You need to bear in mind that the average length for intercourse is between two and five minutes. Most guys with PE think it’s much, much longer. Bet you did too!