• "She comes too quickly - it's really frustrating!"


    My girl and I are both 21, the problem for us is that she is very sensitive down below, so she doesn’t last very long before she has an orgasm. Nine times out of 10 it’s before me. After she’s come she doesn’t want to carry on, so I have to stop. She then either leaves me without an orgasm or give me oral sex to finish me off. But I really want to orgasm during sex more often! Are there any tips you give to fix this? It's really frustrating!


    There’s absolutely no reason - apart from perhaps boredom - why her having an orgasm should mean intercourse needs to stop. The clitoris is OUTSIDE the vagina, not inside it. So no matter how sensitive she gets after an orgasm, it won’t affect you being inside her. While it’s usual for women to report sensitivity around the clitoral area post orgasm, I can’t say I’ve heard of any who feel sensitive inside the vagina after an orgasm. Plenty say they lose incentive to continue but, unless you’ve been pounding away for ages (which you say you don’t), she’s unlikely to be sore either. Add to this that you’re young and the majority of women don’t orgasm purely penetration, I suspect this is more about her not particularly enjoying intercourse and using over-sensitivity as an excuse to cut it short.

    Initiate some new positions and see if that makes a difference. Change your thrusting style so it’s nice and slow. Make circles with your hips, rather than do a ‘jackhammer’. Use lube. Do you work on her clitoris with your fingers or a vibrator while you’re penetrating her? If you do, start introducing clitoral stimulation a bit later on, when you’re just about to orgasm. If you aren’t using fingers or a vibe during intercourse, start. I know this seems like strange advice when you’re trying to get her to last longer before she comes, but I have another theory about all of this. I wonder if she’s not having an orgasm at all and pretending to have one because she doesn’t want to hurt your feelings by confessing she doesn’t really enjoy intercourse. All or any of the above may be true. I’ll leave it up to you to act on what rings true.

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    Comments (1)

    • Tish: June 03, 2014 00:35
      I think you should take her word for it, and don't force anything on her like the previous commenter said, as it will make her not like you much.
      Just ASK her what she wants. It's really that simple. Don't conform to what you've heard women are supposed to orgasm from, and try to do that to her. Ask her what she wants to do. Period. Some women orgasm from penetration ONLY. We're all different.
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