• Question:

    My husband and I are both in our early fifties and our children have now grown up and fled the nest. We still love each other very much but somewhere along the line we stopped having sex. I liked to think we’d outgrown that kind of thing, but now, out of the blue, my husband has started making sexual advances again. I’ve been trying to laugh it off but frankly I find the whole idea of sex at our age embarrassing and a little disgusting. I just can’t go through with it.

    Question:

    I am writing to you because I’m hoping you might be able to tell me what I found hidden in the back of my husband’s bedside drawer. I thought it was a big torch but when I took the lid off, I got quite a shock because inside it looks like a woman’s lady bits. I don’t understand what it is or why he would need this when he has a wife?

    Question:

    I met a fantastic looking man at a party and went out with him last weekend. Before the date, I was both excited and nervous about how the night would go. It went really well but he was so keen and so nice, I’ve now lost interest. I don’t really understand why but it’s happened to me before. Why is the whole ‘too keen’ thing such a turn off for me?

    Question:

    Does watching porn cause premature ejaculation? I’ve heard that’s what causes it. I’ve also heard it’s because guys masturbate really quickly when they’re growing up because they’re scared of being caught.

    Question:

    I’ve been married for 29 years and am 49 with three children all grown up. During my periods my husband still demands sex. They only last two to three days but are extremely heavy due to me being pre-menopausal. This causes friction between us as he has a high sex drive. I don’t feel great during this time and just want to rest my body. He tells me I am selfish. He thinks that other sexual duties should happen which I agree with however I feel drained by my situation.  We have an excellent sex life other wise.

    Question:

    I’ve been with my husband more than a decade and while I am still very much in love with him, I don’t fancy him like I used to. I’m rarely in the mood and avoid sex whenever I can. When we do have sex, I feel like I’m pretending to enjoy it, though I sometimes do once we get going. We have kids but they’re older now and I can’t use that as an excuse anymore. I wish I could feel like I did at the beginning again.

    Question:

    My husband has changed over the years from a happy, genuinely kind man into someone I don’t recognise. He constantly puts me down and rarely gives me compliments, yet still expects sex. My reaction is to think ‘Why should I have sex with him? What’s he done that’s nice for me?’. The end result is that we have stopped having sex and the tension has got even worse. I don’t know what to do to fix either our sex life or our relationship.

    Question:

    I'm seeing someone that I'm really attracted to, the sex is really great (best I have had) but there's something holding me back. I'm not a very sexually confident person. I'm good at the ‘old fashioned’ things like hand jobs and I’m good at going down on him - great, actually!  But when I get on top, I get all self-conscious. I worry I look weird from that angle and while I’m having sex. Also, I don't think I'm very good at being in top generally. How can I become better at all this and really make him think that this is the best sex he's ever had?

    Question:

    My husband keeps going to strip clubs behind my back. When I confronted him - well, I caught him - he said he wouldn’t change. I try everything to please him at home. What do you think I should do? Just put up with it?

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