• Question:

    I love my girlfriend but I’m worried she’s way more into me than I am her. I like her but don’t feel excited about the relationship, like I did with my ex (who dumped me!). We get on okay but it feels like chemistry is missing. I’m not sure whether to continue seeing her in the hope that maybe it develops?

    Choose a ‘fun’ present, rather than a hint your sex life isn’t all it should be.

    Men are much less sensitive about sex toys than women are but you want to spice things up, not give the poor guy performance anxiety! (And on that note, if he buys you something risqué, it doesn’t mean he’s unhappy with your sex life or you, simply trying to add sparkle.) If he’s even remotely sensitive about his penis size, avoid buying any products which claim to make him ‘bigger or harder'. Desensitising creams, designed to make him last longer during intercourse, are a perfect present for that swine of an ex who cheated constantly but best avoided for any guy you’d like to see the New Year in with.


    Get her the perfect gift by remembering to pitch the present to her personality.

    So she’s a shy, retiring type who’s only just allowed sex with the lights on? Rolling up with a gigantic rabbit vibrator, crotchless red underwear and a gimp suit isn’t going to score you brownie points. Neither is watching her unwrap it all in front of her mother - remember to give any sexy present privately and separately.


    I’m not terribly confident about my body but I am a huge fan of sex. I know I shouldn’t worry about wobbly bits but I do and it interferes with my enjoyment. Spare me the lecture about how I should love my body because I am healthy. I need some practical tips on how to be sexy even when I’m having a ‘fat day’.


    I’m 17 and have been with my boyfriend for a year and we’re both ready to have sex. Can you give me some hints on how to make the first time really, really good?


    I’m suddenly single again and in my forties, which I find quite daunting. I also have kids and don’t really have a clue how to juggle new dates and children or when I’m supposed to do it! It feels like the whole dating scene has all changed!


    I’ve just had a caesarian and wondered if you had any tips of what sort of sex positions might be best when I start having sex again. I’m a bit nervous my husband might accidentally knock my stomach.


    I have a good, adventurous sex life with my partner of seven years but I have one fantasy I long to indulge. It stems from a meeting I had with an old school friend I hadn’t seen for years. We were talking about marriage and how to keep it exciting and she told me she and her husband sometimes go to Amsterdam, window shop for a girl, then pay her to watch while they make love in front of her.

    She said it kept their sex life alive and because there was a ‘just watch, don’t touch’ policy, they didn’t have problems with jealousy or any safe sex issues. I thought it was a brilliant idea but when I went home and told my partner, he was horrified and said it must mean they don’t love each other.

    That was several years ago but I keep thinking about it. I want to ask my partner if he’d be up for trying it but I get the feeling he would take it to mean I didn’t love him. In my fantasy, I’d watch my partner go down on the girl, though that’s as far as it would go and I don’t want her to touch me.

    Am I insane for wanting to take this through to reality? And how can I put it to my partner so he’ll either agree or at least not condemn me for it? I feel so strange about this. Help!


    What advice do you have for guys like me who are fearfully shy in a bar situation? More often than not such bashfulness is taken as arrogance. As a guy, we are supposed to make the first move but, for me, it’s harder than you think!


    I always seem to attract men who are already in relationships. Why and how can I tell early on that they’re already involved?

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