Generated by All in One SEO v5.0.0.1, this is an llms.txt file, used by LLMs to index the site.

# Tracey Cox

## Sitemaps

- [XML Sitemap](https://www.traceycox.com/sitemap.xml): Contains all public & indexable URLs for this website.

## Posts

- [The definitive guide to giving her great oral sex](https://www.traceycox.com/the-definitive-guide-to-giving-her-great-oral-sex/) - To be really, really good at giving oral sex, you have to be a generous person who enjoys giving as much as receiving. Being able to deliver delicious oral sex has nothing to do with being born with a big tongue, it takes skill – and it says a lot about a person. While a decent
- [If I want to be polyamorous, when do I tell a prospective partner?](https://www.traceycox.com/if-i-want-to-be-polyamorous-when-do-i-tell-a-prospective-partner/) - “I am interested in being polyamorous and dating more than one person at once. When is the right time to tell a new partner that you are intending on having relationships with more than one person? I feel like it will put a lot of people off.” When I first started writing about sex 30
- [‘The baby arrived and my sex drive left’](https://www.traceycox.com/the-baby-arrived-and-my-sex-drive-left/) - “Help! The baby arrived and my sex drive went. I haven’t felt like sex since.” Emails like this plop into my inbox with dogged regularity – and they have since I started writing about sex thirty years ago. We don’t talk about it directly (or enough) but children put more strain on your relationship and
- [A four-step plan to help women who don't want sex](https://www.traceycox.com/a-four-step-plan-to-help-women-who-dont-want-sex/) - ‘Why don’t I feel like sex?’ is the question I am most asked by women. It’s always been the most asked question and I have been writing about sex and relationships for decades. ‘I dread having sex. What’s wrong with me?’ ‘I’ll do anything I can to avoid it – even though I know it’s
- [Ever had sex with someone just because it seemed rude not to?](https://www.traceycox.com/ever-had-sex-with-someone-just-because-it-seemed-rude-not-to/) - Ever had polite sex? I have. I grew up in the sexually liberated 80s. I worked for Cosmopolitan magazine and was heavily influenced by the ‘Women can do anything men can’ feminist mantra of the time. Having casual sex was what you did. Women had the contraceptive pill and we’d fought for the right to
- [The six stages that lead to a sexless relationship](https://www.traceycox.com/the-six-stages-that-lead-to-a-sexless-relationship/) - When was the last time you had sex? Last night? Last week? Last month? Last…year? I’m the first to argue that frequency isn’t the most important element of a good sex life – satisfaction is. But if Christmas comes more often than the two of you do together, you could be on the way to
- [5 ways to have sex - without actually having it](https://www.traceycox.com/5-ways-to-have-sex-without-actually-having-it/) - Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash Hands up if you think penis-in-vagina sex is often the most uninspired, least enjoyable part. Well, that’s one hand waving in the air – mine! Tongues and fingers are far more dextrous than a penis will ever be, capable of producing far more varied and exquisite sensations. Body parts arranged in a
- [Could your relationship survive without sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/could-your-relationship-survive-without-sex/) - Can a relationship survive without sex? Short answer: yes. A relationship can survive perfectly well without sex. Hang on, I hear you say, survive is one thing but what about thrive? Surprisingly, the answer is still yes. Sex is good for you – massively beneficial – in lots of ways. But lots of couples thrive
- [How to reconnect after a sex drought](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-reconnect-after-a-sex-drought/) - Haven't had sex in...well, let's not even talk about how long? Long enough to make recommencing sex seem like it's going to feel really awkward, anyway. If that's you, you might want to try one of these programs. The two I am going to suggest here are frequently recommended by the world’s top sex therapists.
- [A journey back to joy - and sex](https://www.traceycox.com/a-journey-back-to-joy-and-sex/) - It's rare that I hand over my blog to someone else. But this isn't just anyone. Kelsey Chittick is a writer, comedian, inspirational speaker, life coach - and my co-host on our weekly podcast, SexTok with Tracey and Kelsey. Most importantly though, she's one of the most wonderful human beings I know. Five years ago,
- [When stopping sex isn't the answer](https://www.traceycox.com/23503-2/) - A lack of sex isn’t always a sign of trouble and last week's blog looked at the scenarios where NOT having sex isn't usually an issue. Now let's look at when it is. Deciding to stop having sex in a committed relationship is one of the biggest decisions you will ever make. If sex stops
- [I can only orgasm when I'm on top](https://www.traceycox.com/i-can-only-orgasm-when-im-on-top/) - Here’s the second in a three-part guide for women on what happens when you can only orgasm one way. Is it a problem? Can you be taught how to climax a different way? All the answers are here. You'll find Part 1 here (what happens if I can only orgasm with my vibrator) and Part
- [Hate dating apps? Here's how to meet a man offline](https://www.traceycox.com/hate-dating-apps-heres-how-to-meet-a-man-offline/) - When this book landed on my desk, I thought of at least three or four women I know who’d want to get their hands on it. Lots of women HATE online dating and find the idea of meeting a man through an app totally unnatural. If you’re not comfortable with technology, don’t photograph well or
- [I can only orgasm when I'm alone](https://www.traceycox.com/i-can-only-orgasm-when-im-alone/) - Here's the second in a three-part guide for women on what happens when you can only orgasm one way. Is it a problem? Can you be taught to climax a different way? All the answers are here. (Part 1: I can only orgasm with my vibrator.) I CAN ONLY ORGASM ALONE “I can make myself
- [Is it a problem if I can only orgasm with my vibrator?](https://www.traceycox.com/23486-2/) - ‘What if I can only orgasm one way?’ is a question I am often asked by women. Is this a bad thing? Which method is ‘best’? What do I say to my partner who thinks I should orgasm during intercourse? Can I be taught to climax a different way? All these questions - and more
- [21 proven ways to help him last longer in bed](https://www.traceycox.com/21-proven-ways-to-help-him-last-longer-in-bed/) - Of all the questions I am asked by men, this is the one that always tops the list. Here's a definitive answer: these are the techniques and solutions that are proven to help men last longer in bed. Let’s start with a reality check Most men wildly overestimate what qualifies as premature ejaculation. Asked how
- [Peaking: the technique that stops men climaxing too fast during intercourse](https://www.traceycox.com/this-technique-stops-men-climaxing-too-fast-during-intercourse/) - I once worked for a male online clinic that allowed men to ask sex and medical therapists anything they wanted to know about sex, anonymously. Anything! There were four experts, all of us waiting expectantly, fingertips poised over the keyboard for live chats. ‘I wonder what they’ll ask us,” I said excitedly on my first
- [The perfect sexy present for every stage of your relationship](https://www.traceycox.com/sexy-gift-ideas-that-wont-backfire/) - Want to slip a little something in your partner's stocking that's naughty rather than nice? Fantastic idea! Except...what if they find the toy you’ve chosen a little too out there rather than wildly exciting? Will he be offended? (Is this a hint that I should last longer? Be bigger? Feel tighter?) Will she think she's
- [Tempted to act out your sex fantasies? Read this first](https://www.traceycox.com/tempted-to-act-out-your-sex-fantasies-read-this-first/) - Sexual fantasies and real-life sex exist on different planes: very few survive the transition from the perfect world of our imagination to the imperfect world of reality. Because we’re directing the films that play in our private sexual cinemas, everything runs exactly to plan. Our lovers can predict exactly what type of kiss, touch, lick
- [My ex made fun of my 'orgasm face'](https://www.traceycox.com/my-ex-made-fun-of-my-orgasm-face/) - Q My previous boyfriend used to constantly make fun of the face I make when I orgasm. It’s made me really self-conscious and I’m now worried it will affect sex with any future boyfriends. How can I get past it? Our ‘orgasm face’ is something our parents rarely talked (or indeed thought) about, but it’s
- [Should you leave if the sex is no good?](https://www.traceycox.com/should-you-leave-if-the-sex-is-no-good/) - Q I have met a new man and really like him, but the sex is OK at best. Is this a bad sign? Doesn’t everyone have great sex at the start? Some scenarios are fixable. Technique can be taught, for instance, so if that’s the issue here, so long as he’s willing to be taught
- [I dread sex after having a baby](https://www.traceycox.com/i-dread-sex-after-having-a-baby/) - Q Ever since I had a baby, sex is painful for me. It’s making me dread sex. I don’t want to talk to my doctor because I’m too embarrassed. Quite frankly I am in awe of any women who has been through pregnancy and childbirth. I can’t imagine ever wanting sex again after sex leading to the
- [Who is my affair hurting if no-one finds out?](https://www.traceycox.com/who-is-my-affair-hurting-if-no-one-finds-out/) - Q I’m married and having an affair with man who is also married. I know it’s wrong, but I’m addicted to the sex. Is it so bad to continue? Who are we hurting if no-one finds out? Over the years I have been asked this question by lots of people. Men and women. What’s the
- [Do date nights help revive your sex life?](https://www.traceycox.com/do-date-nights-help-revive-your-sex-life/) - Q Do date nights actually work to help your sex life? The thought of them makes me want to stick pins in my eyes but something’s got to happen or we’re never going to have sex. People want to stick pins in their eyes at the thought of date nights because they involve planning for
- [To bare or not to bare: the new etiquette for pubic hair, drunk sex and how much sex is enough sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/to-bare-or-not-to-bare-the-new-etiquette-for-pubic-hair-drunk-sex-and-how-much-sex-is-enough-sex/) - So, most of you will know that I am now doing a weekly podcast with the award-winning US podcaster, Zibby Owens. Since we launched - 55 episodes ago - we've one so many awards, I've lost count. (I have at least six lots of trophies in my office!) We're thrilled and hopefully you'll like it
- [Take the three month sex challenge](https://www.traceycox.com/take-the-three-month-sex-challenge/) - Every week on SexTok, my weekly podcast, I set a sex challenge for the week. Here’s a selection organised into a three-month programme. These are doable, simple tasks that aren’t too out there, designed to get you out of the habit of lazy, uninspired sex. Give it a try - push yourselves out of your
- [How to say rude things without laughing](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-say-rude-things-without-laughing/) - This is the third in a series of posts designed to help you enjoy three of the most challenging sex acts - without feeling embarrassed. Part one talks about role-play, part two tackles stripping. This week, it's all about talking dirty. HOW TO TALK DIRTY WITHOUT LAUGHING Talking dirty is easy in the beginning: you’re
- [How to strip without feeling silly](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-strip-without-feeling-silly/) - This is the second in a series of posts designed to help you enjoy three of the most challenging sex acts - without feeling embarrassed. Part one talks about how to role-play without making a fool of yourself. This week I tackle stripping. HOW TO STRIP WITHOUT FEELING SILLY It’s the thing most men would
- [How to roleplay without feeling like an idiot](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-roleplay-without-feeling-like-an-idiot/) - It’s a fact that we’re all far more sexually adventurous in our heads than in our beds. Why not take it though to real life? Because we don’t want to look ridiculous in front of our partner. Seriously, most of us would rather put up with boring, routine sex than risk losing face! Now, that's silly! This
- [Pre-written sex conversations to help you talk about sex with your partner](https://www.traceycox.com/pre-written-sex-conversations-to-help-you-talk-about-sex-with-your-partner/) - How do you talk about sex with a partner if you've never talked about sex before? It's something I'm asked constantly, so I thought some pre-written conversations where you simply fill in the blanks would be a good idea. Hope they're helpful! HOW TO TALK ABOUT SEX WITH YOUR PARTNER Before you even open your
- [What it feels like when you can't make your partner orgasm](https://www.traceycox.com/what-it-feels-like-when-you-cant-make-your-partner-orgasm/) - I’ve been writing about sex for a long time yet the statistics for how many women orgasm with their partner remains stubbornly the same. Roughly 40 per cent of women who can orgasm solo, can’t orgasm with a partner. Why? Sometimes our masturbation styles don’t lend themselves to partner orgasms. Sometimes it’s ineffective technique on
- [The good sex etiquette guide: bedside manners guaranteed to impress!](https://www.traceycox.com/the-good-sex-etiquette-guide-bedside-manners-guaranteed-to-impress/) - Ever sent a sexy photo – without being asked? Ignored the hint to leave after a one-night-stand? Do you stop sex the minute YOU’VE had an orgasm? Refuse to reciprocate when your lover pleases you orally? If you answer yes to any of the above, your bedside manners might well need an overhaul! There are
- [The 8 conversations about sex all couples should have](https://www.traceycox.com/the-8-conversations-about-sex-all-couples-should-have/) - Part of this originally appeared as one of my weekly MailOnline columns. It got so many hits, I thought I'd post it here, so it's available permanently. Couples who discuss tricky sex topics are 10 times more likely to have a happy relationship. But even intelligent, otherwise articulate people, sometimes find sex difficult to talk
- [Is it a bad sign if your partner still masturbates solo?](https://www.traceycox.com/is-it-a-bad-sign-if-your-partner-still-masturbates-solo/) - Short answer – no. Lots of people think it must mean their partner isn’t enjoying sex with them or isn’t getting enough of it. But that’s simply not the case. According to a US survey of 1200 people, people in relationships masturbate an average of 10 times a month. Singles do it 16 times per
- [How do the new ED drugs stack up against Viagra?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-do-the-new-ed-drugs-stack-up-against-viagra/) - Q: Can you discuss the pros and cons of erectile dysfunction drugs like Tadalafil/Cialis and how they compare to the traditionally available Viagra? I have read that there are differences between them but not sure what’s advertising and what’s real? About 30 million American men and 11.7 men in the UK occasionally have a problem
- [How (and when) to resume having sex after an affair](https://www.traceycox.com/how-and-when-to-resume-having-sex-after-an-affair/) - I did a special SexTok podcast recently, focusing on the after effects of cheating and infidelity. You'll find it here (Ep 24). Not surprisingly, given how common and painful cheating is, it's proving to be one of our most popular. This blog talks about one of the issues we address in the podcast: how resuming
- [Anyone up for sleeping with my wife?](https://www.traceycox.com/anyone-up-for-sleeping-with-my-wife/) - For most of us, our partner having sex with someone else would be our worst nightmare. But for some it's their biggest sexual fantasy. ‘Cuckolding’ - when someone is turned on by watching their partner have sex with someone else - is the fastest growing fetish in the western world. It’s not like a threesome
- [20 new things to do in bed this weekend](https://www.traceycox.com/20-new-things-to-do-in-bed-this-weekend/) - Everyone knows you need to try new things to keep your sex life fresh and interesting...but what if you can't think of any? Worry not! I've come to the rescue with 20 simple ideas to jog your memory of the stuff you used to get up to at the beginning. Remember those days? When you
- [Why do I have to be drunk to enjoy sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/why-do-i-have-to-be-drunk-to-enjoy-sex/) - Q: I never want sex unless I’ve had some wine. It relaxes me and gives me confidence. Is this wrong? My new partner gets annoyed with me but I find it difficult to get in the mood unless I’ve had a few. A: Plenty of people use alcohol as a confidence booster. One or two
- [The top 13 lust killers](https://www.traceycox.com/the-top-13-lust-killers/) - You can’t have great sex if your relationship is in tatters. Identify the deadly sex poisons that could be threatening yours and get set to confront them head on. This is a ‘wake up and smell the coffee’ piece. Toxic lust killers are things that poison your sex life. We all battle with some of
- [The 10 different sex personalities: what's yours?](https://www.traceycox.com/the-10-different-sex-personalities-whats-yours/) - Forget everything you’ve ever heard about opposites attracting – in bed it’s far more helpful to be similar. It’s not just frequency you need to agree on, the type of sex you both want is just as crucial. Mismatched sexual personalities is one of the most common problems sex therapists deal with – one that
- [A spot of slap and tickle: the beginner's guide to spanking](https://www.traceycox.com/a-spot-of-slap-and-tickle-the-beginners-guide-to-spanking/) - Theories on why a slap on the bottom feels sexy abound. Some say it’s the result of humiliating childhood spanking sessions. When something bad happens to us as a child, our natural, protective mechanisms attempt to try to turn it into something positive. The shame of being bent over a (sexy) teacher’s knee in front
- [Excuses, excuses: what to say if your partner won't try new things in bed](https://www.traceycox.com/excuses-excuses-what-to-say-if-your-partner-wont-try-new-things-in-bed/) - You’re eagerly anticipating a feisty frolic, one hand hopefully hovering over your zip, and they say….no. OK, not quite what the sex therapist ordered but never fear, help is at hand! It’s natural to be a little resistant to change, so here are a few hints on how to talk around a reluctant partner or
- [10 new ideas to get the most out of your G-spot vibe](https://www.traceycox.com/10-new-ideas-to-get-the-most-out-of-your-g-spot-vibe/) - This is a series of posts designed to make sure you’re getting the most out of all the sex toys you own. All too often they get relegated to one purpose: what they’re best for. While every sex toy does have a prime purpose, they’re all far more versatile than you think. Here’s some fresh
- [Fit for sex: healthy genitals = happy sex life](https://www.traceycox.com/fit-for-sex-healthy-genitals-happy-sex-life/) - We devise fitness regimes to give us bigger biceps or shapely bottoms but few people think about how genital health can impact their sex lives. Then something happens – erection difficulties, recurrent thrush, sex becomes painful – and suddenly we’re like, ‘Oh, so that’s what a healthy penis/vulva feels like. NOT like this!’. Most people
- [Sex after surgery or illness](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-after-surgery-or-illness/) - This is a huge issue and something I can’t hope to do justice to in a blog. It’s complex, too: it’s not just about overcoming any physical side effects but going back to thinking of your body as something that gives you pleasure as well as life. Add fear of rejection if your body isn’t
- [18 sex treats to make this Valentine's her best yet](https://www.traceycox.com/18-sex-treats-to-make-this-valentines-her-best-yet/) - Wondering how the hell to make this Valentine’s special when you can’t go to a restaurant, your cooking sucks and flowers and chocolates seem just too naff? Try this combo. One luxury present (pampering and personal) + one classy sex toy + one (or three or four) of these sex treats = one happy female.
- [How to use a vibrator on a man](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-use-a-vibrator-on-a-man/) - "I’ve heard that men like vibrators used on them. But how and where and how do I suggest it?" It's a question I'm asked often, so here's the lowdown. If you’re going to use it on him, let him use it on you first. Wait until you’re both aroused and having some hot and heavy
- [Guilty pleasures: Am I weird for fantasising about that?](https://www.traceycox.com/guilty-pleasures-am-i-weird-for-fantasising-about-that/) - Here’s a comforting thought: no-one’s worked out how to read minds yet. Which means it doesn’t really matter what filthy thoughts are floating around in there! If you choose, no-one but you need know about them. If your fantasies bring you pleasure, cause no-one else pain and worry you simply because they’re a little politically
- [10 new ideas to get the most out of your rabbit vibrator](https://www.traceycox.com/10-new-ideas-to-get-the-most-out-of-your-rabbit-vibrator/) - This series of posts are designed to make sure you’re getting the most out of all the sex toys you own. All too often they get relegated to one purpose: what they’re best for. While every sex toy does have a prime purpose, they’re all far more versatile than you think. Here’s some fresh new
- [10 new ideas to get the most out of your anal toys](https://www.traceycox.com/10-new-ideas-to-get-the-most-out-of-your-anal-toys/) - This is a series of posts designed to make sure you’re getting the most out of all the sex toys you own. All too often they get relegated to one purpose: what they’re best for. While every sex toy does have a prime purpose, they’re all far more versatile than you think. Here’s some fresh
- [Want to have more mindful sex? Try Tantra, Taoism and the Kama Sutra](https://www.traceycox.com/want-to-have-more-mindful-sex-try-tantra-taoism-and-the-kama-sutra/) - Ancient ‘life manuals’ like the Kama Sutra might well be marvellously eccentric, slightly quirky and sometimes downright bonkers in parts. But there are some absolute pearls of sexual wisdom mixed in amongst it all. Before I attempt to pass on what I think are the best bits from three ideologies, I must point out I’m
- [10 new ideas to get the most out of your stroker](https://www.traceycox.com/10-new-ideas-to-get-the-most-out-of-your-stroker/) - This series of posts are designed to make sure you’re getting the most out of all the sex toys you own. All too often they get relegated to one purpose: what they’re best for. While every sex toy does have a prime purpose, they’re all far more versatile than you think. Here’s some fresh new
- [What do orgasms feel like?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-do-orgasms-feel-like/) - Do orgasms feel the same for everyone? Does his orgasm feel different than hers? Read these intimate, first-hand accounts and decide for yourself Biologically, everyone moves through the same stages. We become aroused, then move to a plateau phase (highly aroused), onto orgasm, then resolution (when the body returns to normal). Psychologically, it’s unlikely everyone
- [Perfection is not attainable](https://www.traceycox.com/blog-post-layout-04/) - We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type
- [Example Blog post](https://www.traceycox.com/blog-post-layout-01/) - We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type
- [Example blog post 3](https://www.traceycox.com/blog-post-layout-03/) - Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into
- [Example Blog post 2](https://www.traceycox.com/blog-post-layout-02/) - Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. It has survived not only five centuries, but also the leap into
- [How to talk about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-talk-about-sex-part-1/) - How do I tell my lover what I want without offending them? This is one of the sex questions I’m asked the most. In the beginning, when you’re shagging yourselves silly, talking about sex is easy. In fact, most of us don’t shut up about it. It’s only when things go wrong that we clam
- [A millennial and a man? You'll feel better after reading this](https://www.traceycox.com/a-millennial-and-a-man-youll-feel-better-after-reading-this/) - Own a penis? Usually, if the answer is yes, my next line is lucky you - especially when it comes to orgasms. Most men orgasm easily during intercourse, making couple sex one hell of a lot more satisfying. But if you're a millennial man, owning a penis is turning out to be a source of
- [Here's 4 ways to orgasm during intercourse](https://www.traceycox.com/if-you-have-a-vulva-youll-want-to-read-this-heres-4-ways-to-orgasm-during-intercourse/) - Own a penis? Congratulations: you’ll orgasm through intercourse around 80 per cent of the time. Own a vulva? Bad news - less than one in four women always orgasm through vaginal intercourse. Why the orgasm gap? Well, whoever designed the female body, put the clitoris outside the vagina. Given clitoral stimulation is responsible for almost
- [All day sex play: sex on the hour, every hour!](https://www.traceycox.com/all-day-sex-play-sex-on-the-hour-every-hour��/) - Another day with your Christmas-padded bottoms glued to the sofa watching box sets? How about trading that for some all-day sex play! The idea behind this plan isn’t actually to ensure you never go back to work again or turn you into slightly deranged sex addicts people cross the street to avoid. It’s to get
- [10 great sex positions](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-advice-top-10-sex-positions/) - Ready to shake up your sex life? From romantic to raunchy, comfortable to challenging, a new sex position is a great way to have a healthier, happier sex life with minimum effort on your part. 1. Comfy Sex Face-to-face, intense eye contact, snuggled in each other’s arms... this is more like an erotic cuddle than full-blown
- [What do men need to know to give women what they want?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-men-need-to-know-about-sex-to-give-her-what-she-wants-part-1/) - Want to give your woman a great time in bed? Get to know how her body works and how to encourage her – and you'll both be saying 'yes, yes, YES!' It’s fair to say that women’s bodies are rather less straightforward than men’s. The workings of our genitals and sexual systems – unlike a man’s
- [What do women need to know to give men want they want?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-women-need-to-know-to-give-men-what-they-want-part-2/) - Think guys have it easy because they can orgasm easier than we can? Think again. Men aren’t the sex robots we think they are. Part 1 of this blog talked about what's going on inside their head (their fears, libido, how they feel when you give them instructions in bed and why dirty sex is
- [A first time hands-on guide to solo sex for her](https://www.traceycox.com/a-first-time-hands-on-guide-to-solo-sex-for-her/) - The secret to sexual pleasure is at your fingertips. Literally. If you’re a female who has never masturbated to orgasm, I’m betting you’ve never had one. The secret to sexual pleasure is at your fingertips. Literally. If you're a female who has never masturbated to orgasm, I'm betting you've never had one. Masturbation is a
- [Edge: my new product range to help boost men's sexual performance](https://www.traceycox.com/introducing-edge-by-tracey-cox-the-new-performance-enhancing-collection-for-men/) - Tracey Cox is proud to introduce EDGE: her brand new range of performance-enhancing sex toys and tools designed specifically for men. EDGE is a collection of sex toys created for men looking to increase their stamina in the bedroom. Perfect for use alone or with a partner, the EDGE toys and sex accessories are designed
- [How to prepare for anal sex](https://www.traceycox.com/anal-sex-prep-guide-part-2-fingering-and-rimming/) - Part one in this series talked about how to prepare for anal sex. This blog takes a look at techniques for inserting fingers or tongues (rimming). For simplicity's sake, I've written this from the perspective of the person who's doing it to someone else. I talked about the importance of using a good-quality lube in
- [How to have lust that lasts (Part 1)](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-lust-that-lasts-part-1/) - The fairytale says we meet, fall in love and live happily ever after. It certainly didn’t include being so bored in bed, it’s more fun masturbating than having sex with your partner. Can lust last the distance? It’s not designed to, but there are ways to trick the system. This is Part 1 in a
- [Supersize your orgasm](https://www.traceycox.com/supersize-your-orgasm/) - Ditch the Easter Egg hunt and head to bed instead this long weekend. Follow this step-by- step guide to deliver a supersized orgasm – one for him, one for her! Give him the best orgasm he's ever had Yes, we all know the joke says simply handing him a beer and taking off your clothes
- [How to have lust that lasts (Part 2)](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-lust-that-lasts-the-solutions-part-2/) - It's a depressing but inevitable reality that the lovely sexed-up beginning bit of relationships - 'the honeymoon' - has to end. There's a reason why we don't stay bathed in those delicious infatuation chemicals: it's emotionally and physically impossible to sustain long-term. 'It's the body's innate wisdom to turn down the volume because it cannot
- [I've run out of ideas of what to do in bed](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-if-youve-run-out-of-ideas-of-what-to-do-in-bed/) - We all know we're supposed to try 'new' things in bed to keep everything spicy. But what if you can't think of anything? Lots of couples think the 'new' thing has to be something crazy kinky to work. It doesn't. The trick is to try one or two small things and build from there. Here's
- [Which sex toys team well together?](https://www.traceycox.com/mix-n-match-best-sex-toy-combinations-part-1/) - Some sex toys work even better when used together while others used simultaneously are, well, a little too much stimulation. Which combos work and which don’t? Here’s a list of what I think are perfect pairings. While obviously pleasure is very much a personal thing, if you can see two items on the list that
- [How to use anal beads](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-use-anal-beads/) - Anal beads look like something your three-year-old would play with but they're becoming very popular with couples looking for something other than your standard sex toy. There's still a bit confusion though, about when and how to use them so I thought a bit of explanation would be a good idea. The good thing about
- [What to do if he's not up for it (Part 1)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-if-hes-not-up-for-it-part-1/) - Popular opinion has women turning to face the wall but more and more often these days, it’s men who are trotting out the ‘Not tonight dear’ line. Why have men gone off sex and what to do if it’s happening to you. Even if you only want sex twice a month, even if you actually
- [What to do if she's not up for it (Part 2)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-if-shes-not-up-for-it-part-2/) - Sex life been a bit, well, non-existent lately? This will help if the woman in your life has been less than interested in sex lately. Give Part 1 a quick read first; here, you’ll find practical tips. HOW TO GET HER BACK IN BED Speak her language We all have a ‘love language’: how we
- [What to do if he's not up for it (Part 2)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-if-hes-not-up-for-it-part-2/) - Your partner’s off sex? Here you’ll find practical solutions to get him back in bed again. But if you haven’t read Part 1, give it a quick read first. It talks about why he may have lost desire - which is crucial to know! Stop trying to seduce him if it’s not working. Opinion sharply
- [Six stupid lessons porn teaches men about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/six-stupid-lessons-porn-teaches-men-about-sex/) - Want to be a great lover? Forget everything you’ve ever learnt from porn. Porn is a great accompaniment to solo sex sessions and can work wonders to jazz up a tired monogamous relationship if you watch it together. But if you’re using it as sex education, you really are deluded. Here’s six really bad lessons
- [How to have a 69er that's satisfying](https://www.traceycox.com/instant-sex-fix-3-how-can-we-have-a-69er-thats-satisfying/) - Want to sort your sex life - fast? This is the third in a series of blogs designed to transform your love life with instant, easy fixes for common couple sex complaints. The concept of receiving and giving pleasure at the same time sounds ridiculously inspired but the sad truth is, the fantasy nearly always
- [How do I get him to use a vibrator on me in bed?](https://www.traceycox.com/instant-sex-fix-4-how-do-i-get-him-to-use-a-vibrator-on-me-in-bed/) - Want to sort your sex life - fast? This is the fourth in a series of blogs designed to transform your love life with instant, easy fixes for common couple sex complaints. Some men are sexually experienced and cool enough to accept a vibrator’s going to do it for you more regularly than any part
- [Are you too close for great sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/are-you-too-close-for-great-sex/) - Is your partner your best friend? It’s ironic: the couples who have the closest, soul-mate connection and the best relationships often have the worst sex lives. Why? Because the same wonderful intimacy that makes us yearn to merge as ‘one’, obliterates desire. Nothing kills sexual chemistry quicker than becoming best friends. Here’s how to keep
- [This is how men really feel about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/this-is-how-men-really-feel-about-sex/) - This is a snapshot of what men have told me during the three decades I've been writing and researching about sex and relationships. Read and learn - I certainly have over the years! Every time a woman looks in the mirror and thinks, 'Do I look fat in this?'... A man looks down and wonders
- [Are these the 10 best places to have sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/are-these-the-10-best-places-to-have-sex/) - Just as there are certain sex acts that shouldn't be missed, there are places you should have been naked in. These are my pick of the top 10 places to have sex (though I'm looking forward to seeing where else gets the vote!). Tick 'Yes!' to six and over of the following sexy settings and
- [How to suggest anal play (and how to use a butt plug)](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-suggest-anal-play-and-use-a-butt-plug/) - Q:I really want to try using a strap-on dildo on my boyfriend so he can experience how it feels on my end. I also quite fancy using a butt plug on him during sex. He's not keen and can't figure out what (if any) satisfaction he'd get from it, other than the obvious fact that
- [My girlfriend wants to use a strap-on dildo on me. Will I like it?](https://www.traceycox.com/my-girlfriend-wants-to-use-a-strap-on-dildo-on-me-what-pleasure-will-i-get/) - Question: My girlfriend has been reading girlie magazines and after reading one article has said that she would like to "do me". I asked her what she meant and she clarified that she wants to buy a strap-on dildo and show me how it feels on her end. She'd also like me to use a
- [Five (very) female sex wobbles that can derail your sex life](https://www.traceycox.com/five-very-female-sex-wobbles-that-can-derail-your-sex-life/) - We women are wonderful creatures in many, many ways but we are also capable of worrying ourselves stupid about things that really shouldn’t matter. Never is this more the case than when we’re talking about sex. Sex taps into our most secret, inner fears, which is why it has the power to completely throw us
- [Sex positions for disabled lovers](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-positions-adapted-for-physically-disabled-lovers/) - I believe that everyone should be able to enjoy a fun and fulfilling sex life. So I was disappointed to find that there is a distinct lack of practical information out there when it comes to making sex comfortable and possible for physically disabled lovers. This week's blog post is therefore all about sex positions
- [Help! He Wants Me To Swallow](https://www.traceycox.com/instant-sex-fix-1-he-wants-me-to-swallow/) - This is the first of a series of blogs designed to transform your love life with instant, easy fixes for common couple sex complaints. What do I do if he wants me to swallow? First up, don’t even dream of doing it unless he’s been tested for HIV and STI’s - all it takes is
- [How do I persuade my wife to use her vibrator while I watch?](https://www.traceycox.com/is-there-any-way-i-can-persuade-my-wife-to-use-a-vibrator-on-herself-while-i-watch/) - Question: Is there any way I can persuade my wife to use a vibrator on herself while I watch? She likes me to use it with her but says it's not the same on her own. I would love to watch her play with herself. Answer: Here’s the thing: some women are totally comfortable using
- [50 things I wish I'd known about sex when I was 20](https://www.traceycox.com/50-things-i-wish-id-known-about-sex-when-i-was-20/) - I originally wrote this article for the Mail Online but it was so popular, I’ve decided to share it again here. Wouldn’t it have been nice if someone had handed this article to you when YOU were 20? (And do pass it onto your own kids who are 20-plus!) You'll have your first orgasm by
- [What women wish men knew about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/what-women-wish-men-knew-about-sex/) - Ever wish you came with a set of instructions that you could just hand over to your lover? Well, here’s a list I’ve started for you. Customise and add... and keep on adding throughout your relationship. The more you tell me how sexy I am, in and out of bed, the sexier I will feel
- [40 things I wish I'd known about love and men when I was 40](https://www.traceycox.com/40-things-i-wish-id-known-about-love-and-men-when-i-was-20/) - So you liked my post ’50 things I wish I’d known about sex when I was 20’? Lots of you clicked on it and I’m so pleased! Given the popularity, I thought I’d do the same concept but apply it to love instead of lust. Here’s the end result! Everyone of every sexual orientation will
- [Is your weight affecting your sex life?](https://www.traceycox.com/is-your-weight-affecting-your-sex-life/) - Fifty percent of British women have put off sex - even when they’re in the mood - because they felt too fat. “Bedroom body shame is ruining sex for an alarming, growing number of women, from the petite to the plus size,” says Michael Alvear, the author of Not Tonight Dear, I Feel Fat. “It's
- [8 penis myths - busted!](https://www.traceycox.com/8-penis-myths-busted/) - No other part of the human body is more shrouded in myth and folklore than man’s most precious part - the penis. There are so many stubborn myths surrounding those six inches (except it’s actually not six inches), even savvy sexual people believe ‘facts’ that simply aren’t true. Let’s find out the truth by looking
- [Could faking it help you have a real orgasm?](https://www.traceycox.com/could-faking-it-help-you-have-a-real-orgasm/) - The answer, surprisingly, is yes! Up to 80 percent of women fake orgasms at some point, according to research - and that might not be a bad thing. Turns out some women fake it in order to make it a real orgasm happen. Researchers surveyed 481 heterosexual females, all sexually active but not in serious
- [7 innocent items in your bedroom that kill your sex life](https://www.traceycox.com/7-innocent-items-in-your-bedroom-that-kill-your-sex-life/) - They look innocent enough but these every day items wreak havoc on the average couple’s sex life. Banish them from your bedroom and you’re instantly in store for better, more frequent sex! A TV Couples who have a TV in their bedroom have sex half as often as those who don’t: that’s a fact, supported
- [What's fact and fiction about anal sex](https://www.traceycox.com/whats-fact-and-fiction-about-anal-sex/) - Around 20 to 35 per cent of Western couples try anal intercourse, compared to about five to ten per cent a decade earlier. It might have jumped from ‘taboo’ to ‘tempting’ but the myths surrounding anal sex remain. What’s is fact and what’s fiction? Let’s debunk a few of the most common myths once and
- [How not to kill your husband with an electro sex toy](https://www.traceycox.com/how-not-to-kill-your-husband-with-an-electro-sex-toy/) - Would you let an electric current flow through your genitals if it felt good or helped tighten your pelvic floor? Didn’t think so – but never say never. Plenty of people are doing just that by experimenting with electro sex toys. Given that lots of UK women are reluctant to use a vibrator that plugs
- [The new year sex and relationship detox](https://www.traceycox.com/the-new-year-sex-and-relationship-detox/) - A new year means a brand new start - and the chance to get rid of all those bad habits that plagued you in 2017. Here’s some achievable ways to give your sex and love life a fresh, sparkling start to 2018. DATING DETOX Stop blaming yourself. Women have a tendency to blame every failed
- [What counts as cheating these days?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-counts-as-cheating-these-days/) - In these sexually politically correct times, it’s a brave man who tried to steal a kiss under the mistletoe at the office party. Which is a shame because a kiss is so innocent, right? A kiss means nothing. Certainly nothing you should be going home and confessing to your partner. At this point, anyone reading
- [The 12 reasons you're having an affair](https://www.traceycox.com/the-12-reasons-youre-having-an-affair/) - January is a month of reflection - and decisions. If your relationship finished in a decidedly messy state at Christmas, the start of a New Year offers just the incentive you need to sort things out. Stopping that affair, for instance. Mira Kirshenbaum, one of my favourite US relationship experts, is the author of When
- [The best sex positions for...show off sex](https://www.traceycox.com/top-5-the-best-sex-positions-for-show-off-sex/) - Sex is usually driven by things like lust, satisfaction and love - but sometimes it’s simply undertaken in the spirit of adventure, the desire to explore novel new ways to share one another’s bodies. These show-off sex positions fall into the latter category - and what they might lack in longevity they more than make
- [10 new reasons to love - your wand vibrator](https://www.traceycox.com/10-new-reasons-to-love-your-wand-vibrator/) - This is the first in a series of posts designed to make sure you’re getting the most out of all the sex toys you own. All too often they get relegated to one purpose: what they’re best for. While every sex toy does have a prime purpose, they’re all far more versatile than you think.
- [7 ways to fire up your next solo sex session](https://www.traceycox.com/7-ways-to-make-your-next-masturbatory-session-the-best-youve-ever-had/) - Most men are quite practised at masturbating by age 12 or 13. But even if you’ve brought yourself to orgasm a thousand times, I bet you’ve done it pretty much the same way almost every single one of those. Truth is, the more you experiment with different techniques and varying sensations, the more in control
- [Here's how to have the hottest solo sex session you've ever had](https://www.traceycox.com/heres-how-to-have-the-hottest-solo-sex-session-youve-ever-had/) - Most solo sex sessions are rushed: we feel aroused so grab our vibe, turn it on and a few minutes later, that’s that. You’re missing a trick if that’s all you ever do. Truth is, sex with yourself can be the best sex of all. Especially if you're a female. Who knows your body -
- [How much sex should you have to keep your relationship happy?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-much-sex-should-you-have-to-have-a-happy-relationship/) - How much sex makes people happiest? Is there a magic number of times per week the average couple should aim for to keep both partners happy in bed and out? Traditionally, therapists say sex counts for about a quarter of the total happiness of a relationship. But new studies reveal all sorts of interesting –
- [How to strip like a pro](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-strip-like-a-pro/) - Having your partner strip for you is a top fantasy for both men and women - but lots of us baulk at fulfilling it. Why? We're not only body conscious, we're worried we're going to look like a complete idiot. To ensure this doesn't happen, I interviewed a London-based dancer and stripper who helped me
- [Why fast sex is often great sex](https://www.traceycox.com/why-fast-sex-is-often-great-sex/) - If you don’t have time for a prolonged sex session or don’t particularly want one, give in to the oh-so-sweet pleasures of fast, hasty sex of any form. Done at the right time with the right partner, quickies can be equally, if not more, satisfying than those marathon sex sessions. The trick is both of
- [X-Rated seduction strategies for Valentine's](https://www.traceycox.com/x-rated-seduction-strategies-for-valentines/) - Use 'touch and tease’ for a series of calculated seduction ploys designed to knock a potential target to their knees in a heartbeat... US sexpert Barbara Keesling coined the phrase 'touch and tease'. I've taken Barbara's idea, given it a twist, thrown in lots of autoerotic touching (touching yourself where others would love to) and
- [Sex is better when you're young (and other myths about sex that won't go away)](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-is-better-when-youre-young-and-other-myths-about-sex-that-wont-go-away/) - As someone who's written about sex for more than three decades (yes, that old!), I find it rather depressing that some of the sex myths that were kicking around when I was studying psychology at university are still widely believed today. Here's six, stubborn commonly believed 'facts' about sex that have absolutely no basis in
- [What really happens during a real life threesome](https://www.traceycox.com/what-really-happens-during-a-real-life-threesome/) - Threesomes consistently top the 'Fantasies I'd most like to take through to reality' list for both sexes. But there's an enormous difference between watching one online and having one in reality. Of all the fantasies couples choose to act out, inviting another person into your bed is the one most guaranteed to go wrong -
- ['He had to order in special condoms': the eight worst things to tell a new lover](https://www.traceycox.com/he-had-to-order-in-special-condoms-the-eight-worst-things-to-tell-a-new-lover/) - It’s an inherently human characteristic to want to share everything with someone we’ve fallen in love with. Talking about your past is all part of the ‘I want to know everything about you’ beginning bit, when you don’t just want to be with someone, you want to climb inside their skin and live in there.
- [How do most women masturbate? A hands-on guide to the four most popular techniques](https://www.traceycox.com/how-do-most-women-masturbate-a-hands-on-guide-to-the-four-most-popular-techniques/) - Everyone knows how to masturbate, right? Wrong! Lots of women know the basics but are too shy to ask friends about specific technique. We talk about partner sex with our friends but the nitty gritty of solo sex still isn’t something we share. Which is why I’ve written this blog. Here you’ll find the four
- [Why does he prefer watching porn to having sex with me?](https://www.traceycox.com/instant-sex-fix-2-he-prefers-watching-porn-to-having-sex-with-me/) - Want to sort your sex life - fast? This is the second in a series of blogs designed to transform your love life with instant, easy fixes for common couple sex complaints. What if he prefers porn to having sex with me? He’s more interested in watching porn on his computer screen than he is
- [Taboo sex: why does the kinky stuff turn us on so much?](https://www.traceycox.com/taboo-sex-why-does-the-kinky-stuff-turn-us-on-so-much/) - Kinky sex is coming out of the closet: 84 per cent of us would like more ‘kink’ in our sex lives, and more people than ever identify with being ‘kinky’. Voyeurism, masochism, fetishism – they’re all still classified as ‘deviant’ behaviours in the "holy bible" of mental disorders (that is, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual
- [About to sleep with someone for the very first time? Here's what they're thinking as you strip off](https://www.traceycox.com/about-to-sleep-with-someone-for-the-very-first-time-heres-what-theyll-be-thinking-as-you-strip-of/) - Whether it’s a Tinder hook-up or a long-awaited first night with a potential love of your life, getting naked for the first time can be nerve wracking! You won’t be the first person to wonder what your new lover is thinking the first time they see you stripped bare. My bet is any - and
- [Tired of time wasters? Here's 7 boxes your next man has to tick](https://www.traceycox.com/dont-want-to-waste-your-time-on-the-wrong-man-heres-7-boxes-your-next-man-has-to-tick/) - Whether you want the full shebang with meringue style wedding dress, a live-in love to have kids with or just to be with someone nice who's going to stick around, this is for you. Research and experience has helped to compile this simple checklist to help you sort time-wasting men from potential partners. It's
- [Think you're great at oral because your technique is good?](https://www.traceycox.com/think-youre-great-at-oral-because-your-technique-is-good/) - Here’s six things that matter just as much. Giving great oral is part attitude, part technique and a whole lot about enthusiasm. You’ll find how-to technique guides for both of you here but they’re useless unless you get these basics right. These are the six fundamentals that matter just as much as tongue technique -
- [Are you sexually happy? Here's what sexual happiness means to me](https://www.traceycox.com/are-you-sexually-happy-heres-what-sexual-happiness-means-to-me/) - We tend to measure our enjoyment of sex in terms of performance. But sexual happiness isn’t measured by how much sex you’re having, how long you’re having it for or how many people you’ve had sex with. Sexual happiness is an attitude: a healthy, uninhibited way of thinking about sex that gives you the courage
- [First time anal sex: all you need to know](https://www.traceycox.com/you-loved-it-so-much-its-back-again-first-time-anal-sex-all-you-need-to-know/) - Want to know what my most popular blogs are about? Anal sex, anal sex - and anal sex. You’re all obsessed with it! Which is why I'm reposting one of my most read blog posts. But while it is fast growing in popularity, within relationships, anal sex is still a divisive and delicate subject to
- [The secret way to tell if someone's interested in you](https://www.traceycox.com/love-advice-how-to-tell-if-theyre-interested-the-flirting-triangle/) - Eye movement studies show we look at different parts of other people's faces depending on the situation and level of attractiveness. When looking at strangers or in business situations, we make a small triangle by moving our gaze from eye to eye, dipping them only slightly as we move across the bridge of the nose.
- [I'd Love to Have Sex With You But...(Part 3)](https://www.traceycox.com/part-3-id-love-to-have-sex-with-you-but/) - No time, no energy, no real desire to do it. These are just some of the excuses we drag out to explain why sex is put on the backburner. But there is a way to get past those sexual sticking points. This is the last in a series of three blogs to help you get
- [I'd Love to Have Sex With You But...(Part 2)](https://www.traceycox.com/part-2-id-love-to-have-sex-with-you-but/) - No time, bored or simply can’t be bothered? These are just some of the excuses we drag out to explain why sex is put on the backburner. But there is a way to get past those sexual sticking points. This is the second in a series of three blogs to help you get things moving
- [I'd Love to Have Sex With You But...(Part 1)](https://www.traceycox.com/part-1-id-love-to-have-sex-with-you-but/) - No time, bored or simply can’t be bothered? These are just some of the excuses we drag out to explain why sex is put on the backburner. But there is a way to get past those sexual sticking points. This is the first in a series of three blogs to help you get things moving
- [Solve all your oral sex problems with these five sneaky but sexy tricks](https://www.traceycox.com/solve-all-your-oral-sex-problems-with-these-five-sexy-sneaky-tricks/) - He smells, well, a little bit funky sometimes? She takes so long to climax your tongue seizes? Here’s some simple but highly effective sex tricks that not only solve your problems fast, they’ll score you big sexy points for being innovative! GIVE HIM A CHAMPAGNE SHOWER If you’re worried about the smell or taste of
- [Can women really ejaculate through G-spot stimulation?](https://www.traceycox.com/can-women-really-ejaculate-through-g-spot-stimulation/) - Mention ‘G-spot’ and you know the topic of ‘female ejaculation’ isn’t far behind. The reason why they sit so comfortably together, like two old friends, is because stimulation of the G-spot is what seems to cause women to ejaculate. The urethral sponge tissue contains between 30 to 40 paraurethral glands and ducts (para just means
- [If you don't fancy someone instantly, does it mean you never will?](https://www.traceycox.com/if-you-dont-fancy-someone-instantly-does-it-mean-you-never-will/) - A recent survey found one in four singles miss out on love because they’re obsessed with finding an instant connection. But despite lots of couples claiming ‘they knew’ the minute their future husband or wife walked in the room (forgetting they felt like that about lots of people they didn’t end up with), in reality,
- [How to give him the best hand-job he's ever had](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-give-the-best-hand-job-hes-ever-had/) - As over-excited teenagers, a snog and someone’s hand fiddling around ‘down there’ was enough to make us faint with pleasure. Then along came oral sex and intercourse and both kissing and hand stimulation got struck off the agenda in favour of supposedly superior sensations. Big mistake. Not only is it silly to narrow our sexual
- [Here's how to do your own HIV test at home](https://www.traceycox.com/is-it-time-you-had-an-hiv-test-now-you-can-do-it-yourself-at-home/) - The first legally approved HIV self-testing kit is now for sale in the UK which is fantastic news for anyone who’s ever had a bad experience getting a test in the past. ‘No questions. No labs. No waiting’ the BioSure HIV Self Test advertises on its cover. I would have added ‘No judgement’. I remember
- [How to give a woman a (great) hand-job](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-give-a-woman-a-great-hand-job/) - Given the popularity of a blog I wrote a few weeks ago called ‘How to give him best hand-job he’s ever had’, I thought a female version was in order. Men are usually better at giving ‘hand-jobs’ to women because they’ve had more practice: all that time at ‘second base’ as a teenager, trying desperately
- [Eight reasons (other than pleasure) why orgasms are good for you](https://www.traceycox.com/eight-reasons-other-than-pleasure-why-orgasms-are-good-for-you-and-the-secrets-of-women-who-have-multiples/) - I know none of us need selling on why you should have more orgasms, but few know just how many health benefits there are to having regular climaxes. It doesn’t make any difference how you’re having your orgasms – solo or with a partner/s – just keep them coming! Orgasms make you happier Orgasms boost
- [The truth about what really goes on with sex long-term](https://www.traceycox.com/how-is-it-for-you-the-truth-about-what-really-goes-on-with-sex-long-term/) - How do you stack up against the average? It’s a question I think is utterly pointless to ask because there is no average. We are all absolutely individual in sex - in our drives, behaviour, frequency and preferences. Yet we continue to compare ourselves to this mythical measurement, labouring under the impression that every other
- [Hate hard core? Here's some female friendly erotica and porn](https://www.traceycox.com/hate-hard-core-heres-some-female-friendly-erotica-and-porn/) - Women watch porn. We might not watch it as much as men do – according to Pornhub, women make up over a fourth of all visitors on the site – but it’s not quite the ‘guy thing’ people make out. What sort of porn do we watch? Female taste in porn is as individual as
- [Share a fantasy - without scaring your partner off](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-share-a-fantasy-without-scaring-someone-off/) - Sharing fantasies requires trust – especially the more ‘out there’ ones. Not only do you have to hope like hell your partner won’t judge you, you also need to be 100 percent certain the information won’t be used against you later (during an argument) or repeated to others (the second you’ve split). Personally, I’ve always
- [Here's how to up your chances of simultaneous orgasm](https://www.traceycox.com/think-most-couples-come-together-most-of-the-time-false-but-heres-some-things-to-up-your-odds-of-simultaneous-orgasm/) - I’m writing this a little under duress. I really don’t want to perpetrate the myth that there’s something wrong if you don’t have simultaneous orgasms as often as you clean your teeth. Or that it’s the be all and end all orgasm experience. Truth is, couples coming together – at exactly the same time, most
- [All you ever wanted to know about multiple orgasms](https://www.traceycox.com/all-you-ever-wanted-to-know-about-multiple-orgasms/) - If one orgasm is difficult for some, having two or more is tougher for just about everyone. Why? After you’ve ‘taken the edge off’, our nerve endings become desensitized. We’re often emotionally satisfied and our bodies start flooding with hormones designed to make us believe once is enough. You might want to have sex all
- [The ultimate guide to pegging](https://www.traceycox.com/the-ultimate-guide-to-pegging/) - I remember writing about pegging about 20 years ago and everyone’s reaction was ‘What! My boyfriend/husband’s not gay, why the hell would he want me to do that to him?’ Pegging was the hottest sex trend this year and far from being a fad, is fast becoming something most couples try at least once. For
- [Oral sex positions for every mood](https://www.traceycox.com/oral-sex-positions-for-every-mood/) - There are lots of blogs devoted to oral sex technique but – unlike intercourse – not so many that focus on position. Yet the position you choose to give oral sex in should suit the sex personality of the person who’s receiving it. Most people automatically settle into traditional poses – lying lazily between her
- [Sex hacks to make your sessions last longer](https://www.traceycox.com/super-easy-sex-hacks-to-make-your-sessions-last-longer/) - I’m asked a lot (and I mean a lot) to write about how to make penetrative sex last longer, so you’ll find more than the odd article on my website about this. But before I give you some more practical tips, let me make one point abundantly clear. Before you start judging yourself on how
- [Are you guilty of these common penetration sins? Here's how to make intercourse more interesting for both of you](https://www.traceycox.com/are-you-guilty-of-these-common-penetration-sins-heres-how-to-make-intercourse-better-for-both/) - Intercourse is what many people – particularly men – see at the ‘main event’ of sex. Weird, then, that such an important part of sex gets relatively little attention in the ‘how to’ department. There’s lots of info on positions but, apart from that, having intercourse is pretty much ignored. Here you’ll find hints on
- [4 supersexy things to do with bondage tape](https://www.traceycox.com/4-super-sexy-things-to-do-with-bondage-tape/) - It sticks to itself, won’t rip off hair or skin, is simple to use, comfy to wear and a hell of a lot less intimidating than metal handcuffs or rope. Best of all - it’s not only cheap, you can re-use it! That's why we all love bondage tape - for its brilliant versatility! TRY
- [Everything you need to know about anal play](https://www.traceycox.com/everything-you-need-to-know-about-anal-play/) - Why should you try anal play? Because lots of couples are already enjoying it - in fact, lots are taking it through to anal intercourse. Thirty-seven percent of men and 35% of women report trying anal intercourse at least once. Of those, around half continue to do it regularly. If that doesn't appeal, no problems.
- [How good is your hand-job? Here's a refresher course](https://www.traceycox.com/how-good-is-your-hand-job-heres-a-refresher-course/) - This is the third in a series of practical, technique-based blogs designed to give your sex life a refresh and make it sparkly and new again. This week, the focus is on hand-jobs. GIVING HIM A HAND-JOB BRUSH UP ON THE BASICS Left or right-handed? Choose your position depending on whether you’re right or left
- [New moves, new positions! Upgrade your oral sex technique from great to mind-blowing](https://www.traceycox.com/new-moves-new-positions-upgrade-your-oral-sex-technique-from-great-to-mind-blowing/) - Escape the February blues by revamping a sex life that’s become routine. This is the fourth in a series of practical, technique-based blogs designed to give your sex life a refresh and make it sparkly and new again. This week, the focus is on oral sex. DOING IT TO A MAN BRUSH UP ON THE
- [Real men have erection problems](https://www.traceycox.com/real-men-have-erection-problems/) - This article is the first in a series of blogs about erectile dysfunction (ED) – having difficulties getting or maintaining an erection. Which means most men will immediately click anywhere but on this post. Why? Because not being able to get hard (on demand, immediately and always) and stay hard (no matter what) is most
- [Struggling to get or maintain an erection? Here's what's happening to your body](https://www.traceycox.com/struggling-to-get-or-maintain-an-erection-heres-whats-happening-to-your-body/) - This is the second in a series of blogs about erectile dysfunction (ED) – having difficulties getting or maintaining an erection. Penises are unreliable! Nearly every man has erection issues at some time or another – it’s NORMAL! So, please don’t skip this if you’re a man. This blog talks about what happens to your
- [How to talk to your partner if you're having erection problems](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-talk-to-your-partner-if-youre-having-erection-problems/) - This is the third in a series of blogs about erectile dysfunction (ED) – having difficulties getting or maintaining an erection. And don’t think I haven’t noticed, guys, that these blogs are getting less clicks than others! I know it’s devastating when your penis doesn’t behave the way you’d like it to. But ED is
- [How to use a strapless dildo](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-use-a-strapless-dildo/) - Sex educator Tracey Cox's guide to using a strapless dildo and the pros and cons of using them. Great for role-play and power games.
- [You want it they don't: What to do when your partner has a higher libido than you](https://www.traceycox.com/you-want-it-they-dont-what-to-do-when-you-have-a-high-libido-and-your-partner-doesnt/) - A practical guide on coping when your sex drive is higher than your partners by world famous sex expert Tracey Cox.
- [Four simple techniques that sort most sex problems](https://www.traceycox.com/four-simple-techniques-that-sort-most-sex-problems/) - Four therapist approved techniques that work to solve most sex and relationship problems by world famous sex and relationship author Tracey Cox.
- [10 things I wish I’d known before I'd ever given oral sex](https://www.traceycox.com/10-things-i-wish-id-known-before-i-gave-my-first-bj/) - Remember your first time? It's scary getting up close and personal with a penis when you haven't got a clue what to do. If only someone had told you that.... You use both hands. One hand holds the base of his penis, the other hand follows your mouth. The first stops the awkward ‘bobbing for
- [Is swallowing bad for you?](https://www.traceycox.com/is-swallowing-bad-for-you/) - World sex expert Tracey Cox talks about the risks of swallowing semen.
- [The day I found out I didn't have a brain tumour](https://www.traceycox.com/the-day-i-found-out-i-didnt-have-a-brain-tumour/) - So, I'm going through my bookshelves and happen upon a book I contributed to a very, very long time ago. Like 11 years ago long ago. It was called The Best Day of My Life and was compiled by Giles Vickers Jones and Humfrey Hunter, who asked loads of celebrities and other people to talk
- [Foreskin too tight?](https://www.traceycox.com/foreskin-too-tight-to-mention/) - A tight foreskin isn’t the sort of thing you’re going to mention when you’re at the pub with your mates. Lots of men find it embarrassing – so embarrassing they’d rather avoid sex or relationships for fear of their partners finding out. But it’s not just intercourse that’s painful: masturbating can be as well. Peeing
- [8 new, easy things to do in bed (that you maybe haven't tried before)](https://www.traceycox.com/8-new-easy-things-to-try-in-bed-that-you-probably-havent-done-already/) - Happy 2020 everyone! I hope it’s a brilliant year for all of you. January is, of course, the perfect time to give that lacklustre sex life a dusting off. Help inject new blood with these easy, playful suggestions. Ask yourself ‘Where and how can I touch my partner in a way/place they’ve never been touched
- [Why can I only orgasm using my vibrator?](https://www.traceycox.com/why-can-i-only-orgasm-using-my-vibrator/) - Photo by Yohann LIBOT on unsplash I get asked a variation of this question around once a week and it makes me sad every single time. Even in these enlightened times - when there is so much good, non-judgemental, practical information about sex so readily available – we all still buy into the same old
- [How to have great sex without his penis being the star](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-great-sex-without-his-penis-being-the-star/) - Photograph by Dainis Graveris on SexualAlpha Almost all men, at some stage of their life, will have problems getting an erection. For most, the first time this happens will be a catastrophy of stratospheric proportions. It really isn't though. If I could achieve one thing in my lifetime as a sex educator, it would be
- [Sex conversation starters](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-conversation-starters/) - If there's one thing that shocked me when researching my latest book, Great Sex Starts at 50, it was the amount of close couples out there who don't talk about sex. They'll discuss virtually everything else - with zero embarrassment or shame - but when it comes to having a good old chat about what's
- [Sex spy: what's the best sex you've ever had?](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-spy-whats-the-best-sex-youve-ever-had/) - Was it bedding the person you’d been lusting after for years? Having sex somewhere you definitely shouldn’t? Ticking something off the sex bucket list? Or doing it in a position or place that couldn’t be beaten? I asked a broad cross-section of people to tell me their hottest sex and this is what they ‘fessed
- [The best sex toys to tease](https://www.traceycox.com/the-best-sex-toys-to-tease/) - You’ll often see the words ‘tease’ and ‘sex’ in the same sentence because the former is such an effective way to keep long-term sex alive. Teasing works on the ‘intermittent reinforcement’ principle: if you reward someone every time they expect it, it becomes less desirable. If you reward them every now and then, their excitement
- [Six good reasons why men love sex toys too](https://www.traceycox.com/six-good-reasons-why-men-love-sex-toys-too/) - Bigger erections, transformed everyday positions and out-of-this-world orgasms. What are you waiting for? Sex toys aren’t just for women. There’s a whole variety of pleasure accessories designed specifically for men that you need to know about. And there are plenty more that can turn so-so sex into woah! sex. Here’s six good reasons why you
- [Cut vs uncut: what every woman needs to know](https://www.traceycox.com/cut-vs-uncut-what-every-woman-needs-to-know/) - If you're a sexually active female you're likely to encounter both circumcised and uncircumcised penises on your travels. Here's the myth-busting low-down on what it means for both the penis owners and for you. Circumcision – removing the foreskin of the penis shortly after birth – is performed for ‘hygienic’ or religious reasons. Today, circumcision
- [How can I help to stop premature ejaculation?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-can-i-help-to-stop-premature-ejaculation/) - Question: How can I help to stop premature ejaculation? Answer: PE (premature ejaculation) is when a man orgasms too quickly for his, or his partner's enjoyment. This might mean anything from five thrusts to 15 minutes, depending on who's involved! So don't buy into the myth that women need you to go on and on...
- [What men need to know about sex to give her what she wants (Part 2)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-men-need-to-know-about-sex-to-give-her-what-she-wants-part-2/) - Learn how women work sexually and how to give your partner a great time in bed. In Part 1 we looked at what you need to know about her body, now we look at what's happening in her head, plus what you need to know about giving her handjobs and oral sex... It won't surprise
- [How do I give my partner a prostate massage?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-do-i-give-my-partner-a-prostate-massage/) - Question: What’s a prostate massage? My new partner wants me to give him one and I agreed because I didn’t want to look stupid but I actually have no idea what it is! Can you tell me what it is and how to do one? Answer: The prostate gland is inside his anus but it
- [I have never been able to orgasm without a vibrator. Should I just accept this?](https://www.traceycox.com/i-have-never-been-able-to-orgasm-without-a-vibrator-should-i-just-accept-this/) - Question: I have never been able to have a vaginal orgasm. I am fine with it because I own a vibrator and can orgasm on my own. I have tried to use my vibrator during sex but it doesn’t work so it’s very frustrating for both me and my boyfriend. Should I just accept that I cannot
- [What can I do to make my first time really good?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-can-i-do-to-make-my-first-time-really-good/) - Question: I’m 17 and have been with my boyfriend for a year and we’re both ready to have sex. Can you give me some hints on how to make the first time really, really good? Answer: Yes but, to be blunt, the hints are more likely to help make the first time less traumatic and
- [Four great anal sex positions](https://www.traceycox.com/four-great-anal-sex-positions/) - Anal sex positions can be a lot more imaginative than doing it doggy style. If you're up for some anal action, try any (or all) of these. If you're never tried anal sex before, do both of you a favour and read the Anal Sex Prep Guide first but if you're an old hand, all
- [How much is too much anal sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-much-is-too-much-anal-sex/) - Question: Is it dangerous to have regular anal sex? I’m with the same partner so I’m not concerned about STDs just physical damage. Answer: Here’s the good news: having anal regularly won’t make you ‘loose’ or lead to you being unable to control your bowel movements. (It could, however make you more inclined to break
- [Help! My man wants me to masturbate in front of him.](https://www.traceycox.com/help-my-man-wants-me-to-masturbate-in-front-of-him/) - Question: My new man has told me that he gets off on the idea of me masturbating in front of him. I have never done anything like this before in front of previous partners and am happy to go with the flow but find it initially a bit embarrassing and hard to lose my inhibitions.
- [These two things are life changers if sex is painful for you](https://www.traceycox.com/these-two-things-are-life-changers-if-sex-is-painful-for-you/) - This is the third in a three-part series for women who find sex painful. Part one talked about why sex might hurt, part two detailed practical things that can make sex feel more comfortable. Now I’m going to tell you two easy things you can do that just might change everything for you. They’re simple
- [How to talk to your kids and teens about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-and-teens-about-sex/) - No Shame should be compulsory reading for all parents. It’s – without a doubt – the best parenting guide on how to talk to your kids and teens about sex I’ve ever read. Written by ‘The Shameless Psychiatrist’, Dr Lea Lis, it teaches you how to do it easily, honestly and naturally. Do what she
- [Six quirky sex tricks to give you the X-factor](https://www.traceycox.com/six-quirky-sex-tricks-to-give-you-the-x-factor/) - Photograph by Mahrael Boutros I’m often asked what makes a good lover. Enthusiasm is an obvious answer. Good technique and experience another. But there’s another factor which separates a great lover from the pack: unpredictability. The most sensuous, stimulating sex move quickly becomes boring when it’s on repeat. The next time you have sex, throw
- [Three simple ways to fix a broken body image](https://www.traceycox.com/three-simple-ways-to-fix-a-broken-body-image/) - Another day, another restriction imposed. And for lots of people, this means more nights in, plonked in front of the telly, drinking and eating more than we should. Our spirits aren’t the only thing that’s low at the moment, our body image is as well. Which is why I thought it timely to deliver some
- [What are your options when your partner no longer wants to have sex with you?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-are-your-options-when-your-partner-no-longer-wants-to-have-sex-with-you/) - Sex stops in relationships for all sorts of reasons. But what options do you have, when you want to stay sexually satisfied, if this has happened to you? Dealing with the emotional fallout of your partner making the decision to no longer have sex is a whole other story but here's a fact-facing, practical look
- [The 10 lies (nearly) all of us tell about sex](https://www.traceycox.com/the-10-lies-nearly-all-of-us-tell-about-sex/) - People lie about sex for two basic reasons: to protect a partner’s feelings or to make our love lives sound more interesting than they actually are. How many of the following 10 common sex fibs are you guilty of? Our sex is just as exciting as it was in the beginning Sex can get better
- [It works for men but can ‘edging’ give women bigger, better orgasms?](https://www.traceycox.com/it-works-for-men-but-can-edging-give-women-bigger-better-orgasms/) - Image by Emiliano Vittoriosi on Unsplash It’s often used as a technique to teach men to last longer but controlling your orgasm can help women achieve more intense orgasms as well. Edging (or peaking) is the new latest ‘thing’. But, like a lot of new things, it’s been around for 50 years or so. The old
- [Get your steamiest sex wish granted (without scaring him off)](https://www.traceycox.com/get-your-steamiest-sex-wish-granted-without-scaring-him-off/) - There’s a perception that women are the ones who react with horror if their partner confesses a desire to do dark, dirty deeds. In reality, it’s often men who are most threatened. You asking him to up the erotic ante means you’re reversing the traditional sexual roles – him pushing you to be more sexually
- [Are your genitals making you unhappy?](https://www.traceycox.com/are-your-genitals-making-you-unhappy/) - Image by Dainis Graveris In an ideal world, all of us would feel confident of every part of our body. Not true, of course (sadly) – but especially when it comes to our genitals it seems. A new study (by Bespoke Surgical) found no matter what sexuality or gender you identify with, body confidence about
- [How to talk to your partner when sex stops](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-talk-to-your-partner-when-sex-stops/) - Sex stops in relationships for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes, it's a natural break and it resumes again. (You've just had a baby, been going through a particularly stressful period.) Other times, sex stops and stays stopped. You keep hoping something will happen - surely this weekend, surely tonight - but it never does. If
- [The 8 stages of a typical sex life: What’s coming next for you?](https://www.traceycox.com/the-8-stages-of-a-typical-sex-life-whats-coming-next-for-you/) - A sex therapist friend once told me if someone tells him they know a couple married 20 years whose sex life is as good as it was at the start, there are only three possibilities. The first, they’re lying. The second, they’re telling the truth because they didn’t have good sex to begin with. Or
- [The Kama Sutra's guide to kick-ass kissing](https://www.traceycox.com/the-kama-sutras-guide-to-kick-ass-kissing/) - It's not just a case of locking lips: try the throbbing kiss or the bent kiss, indulge in a spot of tongue fighting, and try out the technique rumoured to make a woman climax purely by kissing. The Kama Sutra turns kissing into an art form. It doesn’t just tell you how to kiss (in
- [8 last-minute sex toy gifts to suit everyone](https://www.traceycox.com/8-last-minute-sex-toy-gifts-to-suit-everyone/) - Got that horrible, sweaty pre-Christmas panic going on because you still haven't come up with a great gift for your partner? Panic not! Whether you're strapped for cash, only just met, are sexual veterans or in the mood to spoil, I've picked the perfect presents for each of you. They're all from my ranges and
- [How to have an orgasm - for women who never have](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-an-orgasm-for-women-who-never-have/) - There's a lot written about the orgasm gap - how men almost always achieve orgasm when having sex with their partner and women often don't. But what if you don't have any orgasms at all? During partner sex or solo? This is a step-by-step guide to helping you achieve orgasm for the first time. All
- [You will never be good at oral sex unless you follow these six rules](https://www.traceycox.com/you-will-never-be-good-at-oral-sex-unless-you-follow-these-six-rules/) - Photograph by Dainis Graveris Giving great oral is part attitude, part technique and a whole lot about enthusiasm. But most of all it’s about respect and generosity. You’ll find guides on how to give great oral here but don’t even go there until you’ve taken on board these crucial basics. It’s a treat not a
- [How to have the perfect argument in three easy steps](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-the-perfect-argument-in-three-easy-steps/) - Arguing more because you're both under more stress? Join the club: research suggests more than half of all couples are feeing the strain of lockdown. The first step to surviving a fight is to remember that every couple argues. Arguments are healthy: they show you’re secure enough to question each other’s beliefs and behaviour. So
- [A hands-on guide to the most popular female masturbation techniques](https://www.traceycox.com/a-hands-on-guide-to-the-most-popular-female-masturbation-techniques/) - Welcome to Lockdown 2: The Sequel. Sigh. The good news is, if you're working from home again, you can take sneaky solo sex breaks again, along with your tea. Which is why I've pulled this article from the archives, just in case any of you missed it. It's one of my most read, ever-popular blogs
- [Five great sex 'kits' to break the lockdown sex slump](https://www.traceycox.com/five-great-sex-kits-to-break-the-lockdown-sex-slump/) - Photograph by Artem Labunsky One in ten of us haven’t had sex since lockdown began in March, according to a new survey. Anxiety and lack of sleep are the top reasons touted for lack of libido with most of us replacing ‘sex time with watching telly (a whopping 63 per cent). Believe me, I get
- [Sex through the decades: which one is the best?](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-through-the-decades-which-one-is-the-best/) - British sex expert Tracey Cox talks about what sex has been like for her in each decade of her life.
- [Energiser, connector, controller or stabiliser. What's your sex personality?](https://www.traceycox.com/energiser-connector-controller-or-stabiliser-whats-your-sex-personality/) - Are you an adventurous 'energiser' or a 'connector' who's more interested in connecting hearts than parts? A giving 'stabliser' or a 'controller' who likes routine? We all have a sex personality and understanding each of yours is the key to having great sex together. If you’re lucky enough to have hooked up with someone who
- [What do you do if your husband isn't interested in sex anymore?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-do-you-do-if-your-husband-isnt-interested-in-sex-anymore/) - Here's my latest video with the fabulous tonic magazine, where I give some workable solutions on what to do if your man has lost interest in sex. The first thing to realise? It's nearly always nothing to do with you...
- [The cool, new sex toys we snapped up during lockdown (and you'll want now)](https://www.traceycox.com/the-cool-new-sex-toys-we-snapped-up-during-lockdown-and-youll-want-now/) - Some baked cookies and planted herb gardens. Others amused themselves by being a little less virtuous. Forty-two percent of people used sex toys more frequently during lockdown. Sales of sex toys soared so high, many retailers were unable to keep up with demand. With time to spare, lots of couples finally gave their sex lives
- [How to deal with painful sex](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-deal-with-painful-sex/) - International sex expert Tracey Cox writes a three part series about dealing with painful sex.
- [Why is sex painful for me?](https://www.traceycox.com/why-is-sex-painful-for-me/) - This is the first in a three part series on how to deal with painful sex. Nearly every woman feels pain at some point, in some circumstance in her life, during intercourse. We’ve all let out an ‘Ouch!’, delivered with an accusing glare, if our partners thrust a little too deeply, hitting the cervix. That’s
- [How do I interest my partner in trying anal sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-do-i-interest-my-partner-in-trying-anal-sex/) - The original version of this blog is seven years old. The reason why I've bothered to redo the entire thing is its popularity. Nearly 200,000 of you have read it and hopefully others will as well. I've added lots more information to it to make it (hopefully) an even more helpful, honest, straight-up guide about
- [How to stop your kids killing your sex life](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-stop-your-kids-killing-your-sex-life/) - It’s ironic that the product of sex – children - threatens the very thing that brought them into the world: sex. It’s not just sleep deprivation that can turn a sexually charged couple into who-can-be-bothered’s in under a week. Children put more strain on you, your relationship and your sex life than you ever dreamed
- [12 ways to make intercourse a whole lot more interesting](https://www.traceycox.com/12-ways-to-make-intercourse-a-whole-lot-more-interesting/) - It’s not just the favourite part of sex for lots of men, intercourse is often what men think of as ‘sex’. Well, guess what? For lots of women, penetrative sex is the least satisfying bit. The clitoris is outside the vaginal canal, not inside, and while a penis sliding back and forth feels amazing, it’s
- [Why are the Brits still the most reserved nation of all when it comes to sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/why-are-the-brits-still-the-most-reserved-nation-of-all-when-it-comes-to-sex/) - Just when you think times have changed and we're all talking openly and freely about sex, along comes some research to dash those hopes. There's something elegant and admirable about the British reserve - but not when it comes to sex. And our continuing reserved attitudes are prevalent throughout a new European health study, 'The
- [What’s the best order to follow if I want to explore anal play and anal intercourse?](https://www.traceycox.com/whats-the-best-order-to-follow-if-i-want-to-explore-anal-play-and-anal-intercourse/) - Photograph by Dainis Graveris on SexualAlpha There’s a very good reason why anal play and anal intercourse are now so popular. (Around 36 percent of women and 44 percent of men aged 25-44 have tried anal intercourse.) It’s a hot spot for everyone and packed with nerve endings. But where do you start, if you’re keen
- [Are you doomed if you love your partner more than they love you?](https://www.traceycox.com/are-you-doomed-if-you-love-your-partner-more-than-they-love-you/) - This article about unequal love first ran as my column on The MailOnline but I got so many emails following it, I wanted to give it a permanent home on my website. Your heart still flip-flops when you hear your partner’s key in the door years after you met. Their idea of being demonstrative on
- [How to have a threesome](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-a-threesome/) - Photograph by Dainis Graveris on SexualAlpha Of all the things I write about, articles on threesomes consistently get the most clicks. Having a threesome remains the top fantasy for most men and women – even though they are the fantasy most likely to go horribly wrong when acted out. My column in the MailOnline this
- [20 straight men reveal their biggest sexual turn offs](https://www.traceycox.com/20-straight-men-reveal-their-biggest-sexual-turn-offs/) - So, I’m looking through my old MailOnline columns, looking for inspiration for the next, and I find this little gem. Ask anyone who writes about sex: the articles that are the most fun to write are the ones where you get to interview lots of people about their personal experiences. For this column, I asked
- [Six things that will make you want more sex in a long-term relationship](https://www.traceycox.com/six-things-that-will-make-you-want-more-sex-in-a-long-term-relationship/) - How do I make myself want more sex? It's one of the questions I am asked the most - especially by women in long-term relationships. There are lots of reasons why women tend to go off sex with the same partner faster than men - less to do with 'natural' libido, more to do with
- [How to find a partner post 50](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-find-a-partner-post-50/) - Tracey Cox, an international sex and relationship expert, gives practical hints on how to find a partner in the second part of your life.
- [Here's me minus a filter: a very candid Mamamia No Filter Podcast](https://www.traceycox.com/heres-me-minus-a-filter-a-very-candid-mamamia-no-filter-podcast/) - I met my fabulous friend Mia Freedman back when we both worked on Cosmopolitan magazine. She's since become a hugely successful entrepreneur and the person behind Mamamia, a massive media company in Australia. Her No Filter Podcasts are legendary and I was hugely flattered to be asked to record one with her. It's 45 minutes
- [Does it matter anymore how many lovers your partner had before you? Here’s the only question you need answered if you're rating relationship potential](https://www.traceycox.com/does-it-matter-anymore-how-many-lovers-your-partner-had-before-you-heres-the-only-question-you-need-answered-if-youre-rating-relationship-potential/) - We’re questioning a lot of things since lockdown and the virus. Which is no bad thing. One tired, constantly rehashed question I’d love us all to kiss goodbye to is the ‘How many before me?’ one, the thing most people trot out around one to three months into a relationship. It’s designed to establish whether
- [Everything you need to know to make your own sex video](https://www.traceycox.com/everything-you-need-to-know-to-make-your-own-sex-video/) - This originally ran as a topic for my MailOnline column but it's something I'm asked so often and is so timeless, I wanted to run it here so it stays in the archives. Since the infamous Paris Hilton sex tape made its way onto our screens - a lifetime ago - plenty of us have
- [Does sex actually get better with age? Here's an honest answer](https://www.traceycox.com/great-sex-starts-at-50-yup-starts-my-new-book-launches-tomorrow/) - Most of you know I've just released a book about sex in the second act of your life called Great Sex Starts at 50. Contrary to what some of you probably think, this isn't a book just about menopause and dry vaginas. There's a whole heap of stuff that happens to you when you get
- [The 8 most common reasons we give to get out of sex: which are valid and which are a cop out?](https://www.traceycox.com/the-8-most-common-reasons-we-give-to-get-out-of-sex-which-are-valid-and-which-are-a-cop-out/) - No time, bored or simply can’t be bothered? These are just some of the excuses we drag out to explain why sex isn’t on the agenda. But which of these excuses are legitimate and which are thinly disguised avoidance tactics? Even more importantly, how do you get past those sexual sticking points and get things
- [Great sex starts at 50! (Yup, STARTS) My brand new book is out today!](https://www.traceycox.com/great-sex-starts-at-50-yup-starts-my-brand-new-book-is-out-today/) - Today is the publication day of my new book, Great Sex Starts at 50: How to age-proof your libido. After writing 17 books about sex and relationships, I was seriously thinking, ‘What else can I say?” Then I turned 50 and thought, ‘Whoa! What’s going on!?!’ I knew things happen to us sexually post 50
- [The 13 things you should never (ever) say in bed](https://www.traceycox.com/the-13-things-you-should-never-ever-say-in-bed/) - Talking about sex is something every couple should do but there are some things that should never, ever escape your lips – especially during the heat of the moment. Hands up who’s ever said the wrong thing in bed – or been on the receiving end of any of these sexual clangers? Oh my God!
- [I get asked this a lot - and here's the answer](https://www.traceycox.com/i-get-asked-this-a-lot-and-heres-the-answer/) - I’ve just had sex for the first time with my new boyfriend and he didn’t orgasm. Should I be insulted that he didn’t come? Should he be insulted that you didn’t either? I’m not psychic, it’s just that very, very few women have an orgasm via intercourse the first time they have sex with a
- [Superhighs and superglue: how love drugs affect your relationship](https://www.traceycox.com/superhighs-and-superglue-how-love-drugs-affect-your-relationship/) - So, what are love drugs? Well, they’re not drugs like coke or MDMA. However fabulous they might feel at the time, the effect isn’t quite as sexy when your nose caves in or your brain gets stuck on ‘seriously depressed’. The real love drugs are what our bodies produce naturally when we’re attracted and aroused
- [Want to know how much people masturbate? Of course you do!](https://www.traceycox.com/want-to-know-how-much-people-masturbate-of-course-you-do/) - Guess what? It won’t send you blind after all. New US research suggests the guilt and stigma around masturbation is (finally) lessening. Masturbation is now regarded as something most of us do, that’s not just harmless but has multiple health benefits. Despite solo sex being the norm, most us still do it in private and
- [Ask me anything: four quirky sex questions](https://www.traceycox.com/ask-me-anything-four-quirky-sex-questions/) - I get asked a LOT of questions. A lot of the same questions, actually! Is my penis big enough? Why can't I climax during intercourse? Is it normal to go off sex long-term? Then there are the quirkier questions. Like these... How do I thrust when I’m on top? This sounds like a silly question
- [What's the difference between a butt plug and a prostate massager?](https://www.traceycox.com/whats-the-difference-between-a-butt-plug-and-a-prostate-massager/) - I've had a few people ask me this, so thought it was worth explaining. The main difference is that a butt plug is inserted and left. It stays in place, inserted into the anus, while you keep on having sex - oral, intercourse, whatever you fancy. The plug sits there innocently stimulating the highly sensitive
- [Say hello to my new ‘ultra-squishy’ sex toy range: a game-changer for women who find sex uncomfortable](https://www.traceycox.com/say-hello-to-my-new-ultra-squishy-sex-toy-range-a-game-changer-for-women-who-find-sex-uncomfortable/) - Most of you know that, as well as write books and columns, I have two product ranges with Lovehoney. Meet the new members of the supersex family: the ‘Soft Feel’ range. This new range is great for: Anyone who likes good quality sex toys that feel amazing on the skin and genitals. Women who experience
- [How ashamed are you of your most embarrassing sex moment?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-ashamed-are-you-of-your-most-embarrassing-sex-moment/) - We’ve all had embarrassing moments in the bedroom – some worse than others. Lots we laugh off at the time and don’t give another thought; others hang around, play on our mind and get magnified out of all proportion. Feeling ashamed or embarrassed about something we’ve done sexually isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes, it’s
- [The top three male masturbation techniques: Is yours making you climax too soon?](https://www.traceycox.com/three-top-masturbation-techniques-for-men/) - Three of the most common ways men masturbate. A practical guide by world famous sex expert Tracey Cox.
- [What to do when your partner and friends don't get on](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-when-your-partner-and-friends-dont-get-on/) - You book the restaurant and warn the waiter your table’s likely to be the rowdiest and the last to leave. After all, you love your friends, you like your partner – they’re all bound to get on, right? At 9 pm, you’re in a cab, sitting in stony silence. ‘I don’t know what you see
- [Hot ways to have long-distance sex](https://www.traceycox.com/hot-ways-to-have-long-distance-sex/) - Today’s couples have it easy. In the (very, very) old days, if your partner lived miles away, your only communication was by letter (yup) and a carefully timed phone call, fuelled by a stack of change. They cost a fortune, so were limited to about one 10 minute call once a week. These days, you
- [Hate online dating and hook-up apps? Here's how to meet a man offline](https://www.traceycox.com/hate-online-dating-and-apps-heres-how-to-meet-a-man-offline/) - When this book landed on my desk, I thought of at least three or four women I know who’d want to get their hands on it. Lots of women HATE online dating and find the idea of meeting a man through an app totally unnatural. If you’re not comfortable with technology, don’t photograph well or
- [Why jokes about penis size need to stop](https://www.traceycox.com/why-jokes-about-penis-size-need-to-stop/) - Ever made a joke about the size of a man’s penis? This blog is written by a guy I chat to on facebook who finds all those ‘innocent’ cracks about ‘big is best’ deeply upsetting. He’s not the only one. I constantly get distraught emails from men, worried sick that they don’t measure up. Size
- [The Tracey Cox (radio) Show!](https://www.traceycox.com/the-tracey-cox-radio-show/) - Popular sex and relationship expert Tracey Cox is hosting a radio show on Jack Radio, a digital national radio station in the UK. She's on every Wednesday from 12-1pm.
- [Six ways to sex up a boring bedroom](https://www.traceycox.com/six-ways-to-sex-up-a-boring-bedroom/) - World renown sex expert Tracey Cox gives tips on how to transform your bedroom into a sex den.
- [Here’s what to do if you can’t find her clitoris](https://www.traceycox.com/heres-what-to-do-if-you-cant-find-her-clitoris/) - A step-by-step guide to finding her clitoris by world renown sex expert Tracey Cox
- [Why watching each other masturbate is the best sex lesson you'll ever have](https://www.traceycox.com/why-watching-each-other-masturbate-is-the-best-sex-lesson-youll-ever-have/) - The only, absolutely guaranteed way to find out how your partner likes to be brought to orgasm manually, is to watch them do it to themselves. Watching your partner masturbate isn’t just sexy, it’s the most informative sex lesson you’ll get. Too embarrassed to demonstrate? Close your eyes as you’re doing it. I don’t care
- [Why lots of couples don't have sex on their wedding night](https://www.traceycox.com/why-most-couples-dont-have-sex-on-their-wedding-night/) - Did you have sex on your wedding night? Don’t feel bad if the answer to that is no. If recent surveys are to be believed, more than half of married British couples don’t have sex on the night they get married. Here's six reasons why... Too exhausted This is the number one reason women give
- [Can you tell what someone’s like in bed simply by looking at their face?](https://www.traceycox.com/can-you-tell-what-someones-like-in-bed-simply-by-looking-at-their-face/) - Talk is cheap - if you really want to know what someone’s like, look at their face. Well, that’s what Siang Mien devotees claim. The Chinese have been practising the art of face reading for more than 3000 years and say our features speak a secret language, telling all about our character and hidden desires.
- [Interview with Dating News](https://www.traceycox.com/interview-with-dating-news/) - Thought some of you might be interested in an interview I did for Dating News, a US website that covers just about everything you could ever want to know about dating and the industry behind it. Pretty cool site - and lots of stuff about me, you might not know. Here it is.
- [Ask me anything: seven quirky sex questions](https://www.traceycox.com/ask-me-anything-8-quirky-sex-questions/) - I get asked run of the mill sex questions all the time - generally the same three questions by men (all penis related), the same three questions by women (mainly desire related). Now and then though, I get a particularly quirky one. This is a selection of those types of questions: the funny ones, the
- [They want it, you don't: an action plan for people with low or no desire for sex](https://www.traceycox.com/they-want-it-you-dont-an-action-plan-for-people-with-low-or-no-desire-for-sex/) - How to balance mismatched libidos for better sex. An action plan with practical tips and hints from this world-famous sex expert.
- [S-T-R-E-T-C-H your next session to make sex last longer](https://www.traceycox.com/s-t-r-e-t-c-h-your-next-session-to-make-sex-last-longer/) - How to make sex sessions last longer with tips for him and her from world famous sex expert Tracey Cox
- [How to have great first time sex with someone special](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-have-great-first-time-sex-with-someone-special/) - A sex expert's guide to having erotic, stress-free sex with someone you'd like to become a long-term lover.
- [What to say when a man asks about his penis size (and what to tell him if it's not what you imagined it to be!)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-say-when-a-man-asks-about-his-penis-size-and-how-to-mask-your-disappointment-if-its-not-what-you-imagined-it-to-be/) - Some of you may have already read this because it originally ran as one of my weekly columns on the Mail Online a few years ago. I thought it was worth repeating here because it was such a popular piece and penis size is still something I'm most asked for reassurance on by men. Seriously:
- [Seriously strange sex practices](https://www.traceycox.com/seriously-strange-sex-practices/) - Virgins who catch salmon with their bare hands, men who have sex with bin liners and castrated penises thrown to the ducks…welcome to the weird, wacky world of sex as you probably don’t know it This is, without apology, not going to improve your sex life in the slightest. I’ve written it purely for the
- [Want to have stronger, sexier orgasms?](https://www.traceycox.com/want-to-have-stronger-sexier-orgasms/) - Anatomically, an orgasm is an orgasm. All orgasms originate from the same place even if some feel different than others. There is only one physical type of orgasm for both men and women, no matter how much we try to pretend there are more. Call them anal, oral, G-spot, clitoral, multiple, sequential or whatever the
- [Should you stay in a sexless relationship?](https://www.traceycox.com/should-you-stay-in-a-sexless-relationship/) - Some low-libido couples happily decide to take sex off the table but the majority of us value regular sex and the intimacy that comes with it. If you’re not having sex and the problem isn’t looking like it’s going to be fixed any time soon, decisions need to be made. Whether to leave or stay
- [What does your sex fantasy say about you?](https://www.traceycox.com/what-does-your-sex-fantasy-say-about-you/) - Just about everyone has sexual fantasies - and there are lots of reasons why. What happens in our heads is completely private. If no-one can see or hear what we’re thinking, there are no rules - we’re free to be totally honest. No-one can condemn us for being slutty, immoral, ‘dirty’, depraved, degenerate, or horribly
- [Here's how you take your sex toys on holidays - without being humiliated by security](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-take-toys-through-airport-security-and-other-toy-travel-tips/) - Summer beckons and so do summer holidays. There's nothing sexier than a hotel room - which is why more than 50 per cent of couples say they're far more likely to have sex on vacation than at home. We're also more likely to have adventurous sex - which usually means packing props like your favourite
- [Six hot hand-job techniques to try on him tonight](https://www.traceycox.com/hand-job-techniques-to-try-tonight/) - Once oral sex and intercourse elbow their way into the bedroom, hand-jobs tend to get tossed into the 'last resort' basket. But if the only time you wrap your hands around his penis is during oral sex, he’s losing out! Another reason hand-jobs often find themselves sitting on the bench is that most people (and
- [The pain-free guide to first-time fisting](https://www.traceycox.com/the-pain-free-guide-to-first-time-fisting/) - Whether you're finally indulging a lifelong fantasy, ticking off a 2016 resolution before the New Year's Day deadline, or yielding to an idle whim, fisting can be an exhilarating adventure - if you follow strict guidelines. Yes I said strict; fisting is no one's idea of a beginner activity. As much as I'm going to
- [Seven steps to giving him great oral](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-advice-7-steps-to-giving-him-great-oral/) - 1. You need access to his testicles, anus and perineum as well as to be able to grasp the base of the penis and slide the other hand up and over. In other words, you need room. Also make sure you’re not at an angle where your hand’s going to end up in a weird
- [Anal play for beginners | Using your first butt plug](https://www.traceycox.com/anal-play-for-beginners-using-your-first-butt-plug/) - What's the body part with the highest concentration of nerve endings besides the genitals? Your bottom! Anal play used to be taboo but now lots of sexually adventurous couples are discovering its erotic potential. While I'm very fond of saying there is no 'right' or 'wrong' way to have sex, when it comes to anal
- [His top six sex sins](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-advice-his-top-6-sex-sins/) - Not that we're criticising...well, OK, we are. While we're all individual and what suits one woman won't suit another, there are some things that pretty much all women find a huge turn off in bed. Check you're not guilty of any of the following guys... Rushing into it A few pathetic fumbles to check if
- [How to have sex in public](https://www.traceycox.com/sex-advice-how-to-have-sex-in-public/) - It's all about the situation: he's immune to seeing you naked pre-bedtime, but a flash of thigh by the roadside is unexpectedly voyeuristic. Learn how to have sex outside the confines of your home, without being arrested for indecent exposure! The secret to loving lustily in the long term is to surprise each other sexually.
- [Take this test to find out if your partner is the one for life](https://www.traceycox.com/take-this-test-to-find-out-if-your-partner-is-the-one-for-life/) - Not sure how many of you know this, but I write a weekly column for the Mail Online. It comes out on Wednesdays (type my name in the search if you can't find it amongst the mind-boggling amount of content). I don't like to replicate but I really think this piece is useful. It's a
- [Make love not war: a podcast](https://www.traceycox.com/make-love-not-war-podcast-with-tracey-cox/) - Sex expert Tracey Cox talks to Terah Harrison about sex and relationship issues
- [On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me…a brand new sex experience!](https://www.traceycox.com/on-the-first-day-of-christmas-my-true-love-gave-to-mea-brand-new-sex-experience/) - Who wants a partridge in a pear tree when you can have one of these erotic thrills! Some inspiration for sexy gifts and treats that are a lot more interesting than dressing up as Sexy Santa. A Christmas shopping experience I won’t forget Remote control love eggs are the perfect tease toy. You (or your partner)
- [The 17 most popular places to have sex How many can you tick off?](https://www.traceycox.com/the-17-most-popular-places-to-have-sex-how-many-can-you-tick-off/) - As the clocks go back and it gets colder and darker, all of us become less adventurous about where we have sex. The good news is, it’s not just your bed that works in winter. Here’s a round-up of the most popular places to have sex, to lure you out from under that duvet and
- [Here’s the answers to the four questions women most ask about orgasms](https://www.traceycox.com/heres-the-answers-to-the-four-questions-women-most-ask-about-orgasms/) - Last week, I did an interview with Rhalou Allerhand from netdoctor about women’s orgasms. The issues we touched on are universal and climax problems are something lots of women struggle with. In case you missed the original, here’s a sum up of what I had to say about the great orgasm debate. Is it common
- [How to give her the best orgasm she's ever had](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-give-her-the-best-orgasm-shes-ever-had/) - If passing you a beer and getting naked whets your whistle, what does it for her? Try turning up with a champagne and chocolate dipped strawberries combo (or even plain old ordinary ones if you’ve left it to the last minute). It reminds us of the scene in Pretty Woman and adds a dash of
- [How to give him the best orgasm he's ever had](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-give-him-the-best-orgasm-hes-ever-had/) - Anatomically, all orgasms come from the same place even if some feel different than others. There is only one physical type of orgasm for both men and women, no matter how much we try to pretend there are more. Call them anal, oral, G-spot, clitoral, multiple, sequential or whatever the hell you like, but an
- [When in the month do most women feel like having sex?](https://www.traceycox.com/when-in-the-month-do-most-women-feel-like-having-sex/) - There’s a misconception about male and female sex drives. Men are supposed to get an erection putting a coin in a vending machine, women are supposed to feign a headache the second we glimpse a bulge in your jeans. Both are wrong. Our sex drives differ but it’s more in when and why we
- [12 Things I Bet You Didn’t Know About the Penis](https://www.traceycox.com/12-things-i-bet-you-didnt-know-about-the-penis/) - It’s an object of worship yet causes more anxiety than any other body part. Myths about the male member abound, so let’s dispel a few, shall we? Turns out you can’t really predict the size of his penis by the size or his feet or nose - but there are damn good reasons to be
- [20 Ways to Get Him Hard](https://www.traceycox.com/20-ways-to-get-him-hard/) - Want some quick, easy to do ideas on how to turn on your lover? Here’s 20 X-rated suggestions that will definitely meet with his approval... 1. Snog him sexily in front of his friends. It doesn’t need to be a long one to make him look and feel like a Rock God when his friends
- [20 Ways to Get Her Hot](https://www.traceycox.com/20-ways-to-get-her-hot/) - Out to impress? Here's 20 very racy things to make her melt - and want you more than she's ever wanted anyone... 1. Tell her your wickedest, dirtiest thoughts about her. Whisper them close to her ear as you work on her with your hands. 2. Take her underwear shopping to a sexy lingerie store.
- [19 Foolproof Signs He's Interested in You](https://www.traceycox.com/19-foolproof-signs-hes-interested-in-you/) - Legend has it men make the first move while women - sweet, passive, delicate little flowers that we are - wait patiently to be chosen. What a load of bollocks. Women have always made the first move and orchestrated the pace, flow and direction of romantic relationships. Masters of intuition and emotional manipulation, adept at
- [20 Sexual Signals that Show She's Interested in You](https://www.traceycox.com/20-sexual-signals-that-show-shes-interested-in-you/) - The skill of reading body language might seem old school given lots of people hook up on screen rather than in person. But at some point - at this stage anyway - there will still be that moment when you both meet in the flesh and size each other up. That's when you realise being
- [6 Signature Sex Moves to Make You Stand Out From the Crowd](https://www.traceycox.com/6-signature-sex-moves-to-make-you-stand-out-from-the-crowd/) - Testicle teasers, hand-job hints and other killer combos. Part one of a two-part blog on signature sex moves that guarantee you won’t be forgotten in a hurry. GET HER TO OPEN UP If you think she’s body confident and you want to up the ante during oral sex, pull back and push her legs open.
- [Do this one thing tonight and dramatically improve your sex life](https://www.traceycox.com/do-this-one-thing-tonight-and-dramatically-improve-your-sex-life/) - There’s one simple thing you can do to make sure you and your partner are sexually satisfied for life - and you’d be surprised at how few couples actually do it. Masturbating in front of your partner while they watch you isn’t just sexy, it’s the most informative sex lesson you’ll get. The only, absolutely
- [First time anal sex: all you need to know](https://www.traceycox.com/first-time-anal-sex-all-you-need-to-know/) - While growing in popularity, within relationships anal sex can still be a divisive and delicate subject to broach. Generally speaking, most men are keen to give it a go while most women are more cautious. Interestingly, gay men also approach their first time with trepidation and the same guy who assured you it wouldn't hurt
- [Could a sex contract save your sex life?](https://www.traceycox.com/could-a-sex-contract-save-your-sex-life/) - “I promise to have sex with you once a week and come up with something new to try at least twice a month. In return, you promise to kiss me more, spend more time on foreplay and give me lots of compliments in bed.” As far as New Year’s resolutions go, making a formal contract
- [What's the sexual appeal of being spanked?](https://www.traceycox.com/whats-the-sexual-appeal-of-being-spanked/) - Question: My husband wants to spank me. I’ve got nothing particularly against it but don’t quite get where it all comes from (apart from the Fifty Shades thing, which didn’t do a thing for me). Why does everyone think spanking is such a turn on? Is it a healthy thing for couples to do? Answer:
- [When we do girl-on-top, I get all self-conscious. How can I get over it?](https://www.traceycox.com/when-we-do-girl-on-top-i-get-all-self-conscious-how-can-i-get-over-it/) - Question: I'm seeing someone that I'm really attracted to, the sex is really great (best I have had) but there's something holding me back. I'm not a very sexually confident person. I'm good at the ‘old fashioned’ things like hand jobs and I’m good at going down on him - great, actually! But when I
- [What To Do If She's Not Up For It (Part 1)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-to-do-if-shes-not-up-for-it-part-1/) - You vowed to forsake all others - now she’s forsaken you. What do you do if you’ve been erotically exiled? Figure out what’s going on in her head, then fix it in bed, that’s what! This is the first part of a two-part blog aimed at sorting the problem. Part 1 deals with getting her
- [My wife prefers to masturbate than have sex with me. What can I do?](https://www.traceycox.com/my-wife-prefers-to-masturbate-than-have-sex-with-me-what-can-i-do/) - Question: The other night I was really horny and initiated sex with my wife but she rejected me. I fell asleep but later woke up to find my wife masturbating in bed beside me. I feel upset and rejected by her preferring to do it herself when she could have had the real thing. Answer:
- [Is there any harm in cheating if my partner never finds out?](https://www.traceycox.com/is-there-any-harm-in-cheating-if-my-partner-never-finds-out/) - Question: I am about to go on a holiday with my girlfriends who are all married. We’ve all been with our partners for ages and started talking about what would happen if any of us did anything naughty out there (ie had a one-night-stand) and decided if we adopted the male motto of ‘What happens
- [The seven things most women believe about men and sex that simply aren't true](https://www.traceycox.com/the-seven-things-most-women-believe-about-men-and-sex-that-simply-arent-true/) - Why you need to dismiss these silly sex assumptions society makes about men that actually have little or no basis in fact. He’ll thank you for it – and you’ll feel better as well! 1. Men are obsessed with porn Men watch porn – most men watch porn. But most men enjoy porn without binging
- [How Do I Suggest a Threesome?](https://www.traceycox.com/how-do-i-suggest-a-threesome/) - Having a threesome is still the most desired and requested fantasy that people want to take through to reality - despite being one of the riskiest! And it's not just actually having one that causes problems, merely suggesting it means stepping into precarious territory. Here's how to minimise the fall out. It depends a lot
- [How to give him outstanding oral sex](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-give-him-outstanding-oral-sex/) - Lots of other body parts hog the limelight when it comes to sex, but the organ which he probably appreciates the most is the tongue... Oral sex is all about power – in a win-win type of way. Getting someone to lick your bits puts them in a submissive position which used to be thought
- [13 great reasons to masturbate](https://www.traceycox.com/13-great-reasons-to-masturbate/) - Not that any of us really need to justify indulging in a solo sex session, but here are 13 reasons why you should do it more, not less! 1. It feels fantastic. 2. It’s how women learn to orgasm. Of the women who have discovered how to masturbate, virtually all can masturbate to orgasm –
- [What women need to know to give men what they want (Part 1)](https://www.traceycox.com/what-women-need-to-know-to-give-men-what-they-want-part-1/) - Ready, willing and able, right? You might be surprised. Far from being swaggering sexual studs, a lot of men want and need erotic clarity. Men - and most particularly their penises - are vulnerable. Which means they can feel just as nervous and anxious about performing in bed as women do. Fear is not a
- [How to age-proof your libido](https://www.traceycox.com/how-to-age-proof-your-libido/) - There's lot of new research suggesting sex actually gets better with age. One recent study (published earlier this year by researchers at the University of Manchester) found that 80% of sexually active men over 50 are satisfied with their sex lives up until their ninth decade. Eighty-five percent of sexually active women aged 50 to

## Pages

- [Home](https://www.traceycox.com/) - Popular international sex and relationship expert Tracey Cox posts helpful weekly blogs and info about her books, columns and products on her website.
- [Watch/Listen](https://www.traceycox.com/videos/) - Here's my weekly podcast! The multi-award winning podcast has had a revamp. It’s sexier and sassier with no-holds-barred answers to all your sex dilemmas. My new co-host is Kelsey Chittick, a writer and comic. She’s in her 40s and out there dating again after 21 years of marriage. Kelsey is as funny as hell and,
- [About](https://www.traceycox.com/about/) - SEX EDUCATOR AND WRITER As one of the world’s foremost writers on sex and relationships, I’ve toured the world as an international sex, body language and relationship expert. I’ve appeared on Oprah, CNN and The Today Show in the US, as well as many prime-time TV and chat shows world-wide. “I think of myself as
- [Shop](https://www.traceycox.com/store/)
- [Get ready for the ride of your life!](https://www.traceycox.com/great-sex-starts-at-50/) - Ian Kerner Still sexy after all these years… Tracey Cox has been delivering exceptional sex advice for twenty years running, and her latest book inspires women of all ages to never lower their sexpectations. PhD, LMFT, sex therapist, and New York Times bestselling author of She Comes First About the book There’s no denying that
- [Clients](https://www.traceycox.com/clients/) - Clients Style 03
- [Blog](https://www.traceycox.com/blog/) - If I want to be polyamorous, when do I tell a prospective partner? by Tracey Cox|01 June 202401 May 2024 "I am interested in being polyamorous and dating more than one person at once. When... ‘The baby arrived and my sex drive left’ by Tracey Cox|12 May 202401 May 2024 “Help! The baby arrived and
- [draft](https://www.traceycox.com/draft/) - If I want to be polyamorous, when do I tell a prospective partner? by Tracey Cox|01 June 202401 May 2024 "I am interested in being polyamorous and dating more than one person at once. When... ‘The baby arrived and my sex drive left’ by Tracey Cox|12 May 202401 May 2024 “Help! The baby arrived and
- [website revamp (coming soon)](https://www.traceycox.com/coming-soo/) - Traceycox.com is getting a revamp but you can pre-order your US copy of Great Sex Starts At 50 here
- [Books](https://www.traceycox.com/books/) - Best-selling author Tracey Cox has sold millions of sex advice and relationship guidance books worldwide. Tracey's sex books not only guide you through the basics but offer innovative, saucy suggestions to keep things steaming hot. For the complete list of Tracey's books, visit her page on Amazon Best-Selling Tracey Cox Books Take your pick from Tracey's

## Portfolio

- [Portfolio title 1](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio/portfolio-title-1/)
- [Portfolio title 10](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio/portfolio-title-10/)
- [Portfolio title 11](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio/portfolio-title-11/)

## Categories

- [Tracey Cox](https://www.traceycox.com/category/tracey-cox/)
- [Erectile dysfunction](https://www.traceycox.com/category/erectile-dysfunction/)
- [Post Category](https://www.traceycox.com/category/postcategory/)
- [Standard](https://www.traceycox.com/category/blog-standard/)
- [Uncategorized](https://www.traceycox.com/category/uncategorized/)

## Tags

- [popular](https://www.traceycox.com/tag/popular/)
- [Advertisement](https://www.traceycox.com/tag/advertisement/)
- [Artistry](https://www.traceycox.com/tag/artistry/)
- [Blog](https://www.traceycox.com/tag/blog/)
- [Conceptual](https://www.traceycox.com/tag/conceptual/)

## Portfolio Categories

- [Branding Portfolio Fullscreen Vertical](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio-category/branding-portfolio-fullscreen-vertical/)
- [Category 2](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio-category/category-2/)
- [Category 3](https://www.traceycox.com/portfolio-category/category-3/)