My new man has told me that he gets off on the idea of me masturbating in front of him. I have never done anything like this before in front of previous partners and am happy to go with the flow but find it initially a bit embarrassing and hard to lose my inhibitions. Have you got any tips for making it more sexually pleasing for us both?
It’s worth getting over that initial embarrassment because by watching each other masturbate, you see first-hand what technique you each use – the pressure and speed, how you speed it up or slow it down on approach to orgasm, how you stimulate yourself (or not) while you’re actually having an orgasm and what you do with your spare hand.
All you need do then is copy each other. Generally, men are more comfortable masturbating than women are so get him to go first to break the ice. Put your hand over his so you can feel the pressure and rhythm he uses.
When it’s your turn, close your eyes so you can’t see him watching, lick your fingers, then simply touch yourself the way you would if he wasn’t there. Tell him, he gets a sneak preview only and start by showing one technique you use: come on – that’s a mere ten seconds of embarrassment!
After that, get him to put his hand over yours and continue doing it for you. Once you’ve done this once, you’ll be less nervous next time around and the more confident you get, the longer you’ll do it for. Open your eyes once you feel comfortable and don’t expect to bring yourself to orgasm until you’re truly relaxed into it (though this doesn’t stop you putting on an impressive floor show for him in the meantime!)