The Kama Sutra’s guide to kick-ass kissing

It’s not just a case of locking lips: try the throbbing kiss or the bent kiss, indulge in a spot of tongue fighting, and try out the technique rumoured to make a woman climax purely by kissing.

The Kama Sutra turns kissing into an art form.

It doesn’t just tell you how to kiss (in painstaking detail), it tells you where, when and what type of kiss to use if you want to do everything from wake your partner for morning sex (‘the kiss that kindles love’ involves planting one on them while they’re sleeping to show you’re in the mood for sex) to how to annoy the hell out of them (‘the kiss that turns away’ is what you do when you’re feeling needy and they’re not paying you enough attention).

Kissing is seen as a powerful tool to manipulate your lover and get your needs met. In Hindu and Tantric texts, the kiss is also considered A Big Deal because they believe mingling saliva harmonises the opposite energies of men and women.

It’s so sacred and intimate in India, until recently, kissing wasn’t even shown in films and husband and wife would never pucker up publicly.

Even today, we can’t hide how up close and personal kissing is. Sex workers often refuse to do it and it’s still one of the most intimate ways lovers communicate with each other.

Here’s what the mystical masters have to say about making mouth music.


Considering the tongue contains more nerves and muscles than almost any other part of the body, it’s not hard to figure why tongue-tussling features strongly in our sexuality today. Happily, it plays a key role in spiritual sex as well.

Combine lots of tongue action with some rather creative sucking techniques and bucketloads of intense gazing and you’re on the way to tantric kiss bliss!

The uttarachumbita: Weird name – weird concept. But massively appealing! Tantrics believe there’s a direct link between the clitoris and a woman’s upper lip – to the point where he can actually give her an orgasm without ever removing her knickers! See if it works for you two.

First, get her to lift her top lip, look above her two front teeth and find the small piece of connective tissue between her upper lip and her gum. That’s the frenulum – the bit you needs to focus on.

Start kissing with you sucking her top lip while she sucks on your bottom one. Using your tongue, find her frenulum and suck and draw on it using your tongue and lips.

She didn’t feel any tingling down below? Never mind – it still feels pretty damn sexy!

The eye lock: Make loads of eye contact during kissing and you add both intimacy and eroticism.

The breathe-in-each-other’s-breath one: If you can get past the yucky thought of it (and happen to be involved with someone with fresh breath), this does> make you feel much closer.

Press your foreheads together for a minute or more, then have a conventional kiss, except inhale while they’re exhaling and vice versa. As they breathe out, you’re breathing in.

As you do it, imagine you’re giving yourself to each other through your breath. I know, it still sounds daft but just try it once.

Soul kissing: This is an incredibly intimate and bonding exercise so best save it for a long-term lover rather than a bit on the side. Get your partner to masturbate to orgasm while you kiss them intensely and erotically.

Then, as you feel them about to climax, pull back, get them to open their eyes and hold their face in your hands looking deep into their eyes.

And there’s more….

Suck their tongue, lick the inside of their lips, nip their lips with your teeth.

Use your tongue to explore their whole face – lick their eyelids, ears and underside of the chin. Sounds unhygienic? Think about the other parts of them you happily lick!

Suck each other’s tongues simultaneously – hard – when you’re both on the verge of orgasm.

Use your fingers – as you lick and suck on their mouth, insert your fingers and let them suck on them as well.

Use your tongue to explore their hands – the skin between the fingers is particularly sensitive. Pushing your tongue in between them has connotations of cunnilingus, sucking his thumb conjures up delicious thoughts of what you might move on to do to his penis….

Keep kissing erotically after either of you orgasms and you’re much more likely to keep going and enjoy second helpings of sex.

Lick the roof of their mouth (some people love this, others – like me – find it just tickles and feels weird!)

Thrust with your tongue, imitating intercourse, while you’re having it.

Pull back between kisses to read their expression and make eye contact. When they impatiently lunge back in, hold back for a few seconds to tease.

Make a kiss soulful by cradling their face in your hands, or to make it passionate, hold their arms above their hand with one hand, and explore their body with your other while you kiss.

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