Here’s six things that matter just as much.
Giving great oral is part attitude, part technique and a whole lot about enthusiasm.
You’ll find how-to technique guides for both of you here but they’re useless unless you get these basics right.
These are the six fundamentals that matter just as much as tongue technique – and they apply to every sex and everyone.
It’s a treat not a chore.
Behave that way. Treat the whole thing like it’s a huge favour and the experience will be awful no matter how practised your tongue techniques.
Giving your partner pleasure should be just as fulfilling for you as it is for them. (Well, nearly.)
The best oral sessions are those that are offered enthusiastically, not asked for and delivered begrudgingly.
Don’t pretend you’re in a porn film.
Ignore anything you’ve seen in porn – it’s totally misleading.
For a start, you can’t normally see what’s happening because their face is pressed against you.
It feels better like that.
They only pull back in porn so you can see what’s going on.
Girls deep throat everyone and you don’t have to in real life, guys suck hard on clitorises, pulling them out like they’re made of chewing gum.
Do that in real life and you’ll probably never see her genitals up close and personal again (or her, for that matter).
Make sure your bits are lickable.
Take regular showers, keep your pubic hair under control (unless wild is your thing!) and while we’re on the topic of hair, guys, can you please shave before going down on us? Stubble’s sexy to look at, not so sexy when it’s scraping a layer of skin off our thighs.
What do you with your pubic hair is individual.
Some people love the completely naked look and it certainly makes everything nice and clean and her clitoris easier to find.
Others find it a total turn-off because of the whole ‘Ew, you look like an adolescent’ or for other reasons.
I say, do what makes you happy and your partner will probably be happy too.
Give each other guidance.
I think a good ‘let’s learn about each other’ session works well about the fifth or sixth time you’ve slept together because you’ve got over that initial shyness.
This won’t be the sexiest OS session you’ve had in your lives but it will pay off big time for future sessions.
Start by talking about what you like, then demonstrate.
He can suck her finger to show what he likes, she can lick his (or her) palm to do the same.
Then try it out on your actual bits.
Do it with the lights on or in daylight.
Instruct, don’t order and be tactful. ‘That feels great’ or ‘I liked the other way better’ rather than barking out ‘Stop now. I hate it’.
It’s more about connection not technique.
Everyone is individual and to be the best your partner has ever had, you’ve got to be constantly on the alert for their reaction to whatever you’re trying.
It’s not about getting the technique ‘right’ or showing off, it’s about giving that particular person pleasure.
Timing is crucial as well: go down too early and you may get a very different reaction to doing it when they’re more turned on.
It’s got to be reciprocal.
I’m not saying you both have to do each other in the same session but I am saying it should even up over time.
If your partner wants you to do it to them but won’t ever reciprocate, without a good reason for doing so, refuse.
It’s selfish, unfair and totally unacceptable.
If you can’t get rid of their attitude, get rid of them.