My husband wants to spank me. I’ve got nothing particularly against it but don’t quite get where it all comes from (apart from the Fifty Shades thing, which didn’t do a thing for me). Why does everyone think spanking is such a turn on? Is it a healthy thing for couples to do?
The person spanking has control and power over their partner which is equally as exciting. (Tie them up with some bondage tape before spanking to really up the ante.) ‘Hurting’ others or letting them hurt you is unacceptable – this makes it forbidden (and an instant aphrodisiac). The animal kingdom often bite during mating. So do humans. Pain causes of rush of adrenalin, which turns us on and heightens excitement. It’s one of the strongest sensations you can feel – and it doesn’t diminish once you’re accustomed to it. Light and consistent stroking or touching is screened out by our subconscious, pain stays in our awareness.
It’s absolutely healthy for couples to try- so long as both people involved are happy with it and it’s being done to excite not coerce. You’re neutral to it rather than against it, so why not indulge your husband and give it the old college try. Anything that pushes you out of your comfort zone, brings you into the moment. And when we are in the moment, we’re fully immersed in how we’re feeling and what we’re experiencing. ‘Comfortable’ sex very quickly gets boring. Sex that’s edgy and feels slightly dangerous, keeps you engaged and excited.