There are lots of blogs devoted to oral sex technique but – unlike intercourse – not so many that focus on position.
Yet the position you choose to give oral sex in should suit the sex personality of the person who’s receiving it.
Most people automatically settle into traditional poses – lying lazily between her legs or lying beside him (the absolute worst and least effective positions of all to deliver good oral, by the way).
Stand out from the crowd next time by choosing something that fits the mood and the individual.
Here’s some ideas to get you started.
DOING IT TO HER
She takes ages
Try her seated, slouched forward in a chair or sitting on the kitchen worktop. Get her to slide forward, so her crotch is on the edge. Put pillows under your knees for comfort and to get the height right. It’s easy on your neck, you can use your fingers and see exactly what you’re doing. Get her to put her feet on your shoulders or something else close by (though preferably not the dinner you’ve just cooked).
She’s fussy or you’re unsure what she really wants
Get her to straddle you. You’re on your back, she climbs on board, facing in either direction (depending on whether you’re a breast or bottom person!) and balances by putting her hands on the wall or bed head. She’s got control over everything in this position because she can lift or lower to position herself just so. There’s something fabulously filthy about it as well. Put a pillow under your neck and it’s quite relaxed though some people feel a bit suffocated. If she crouches too low, it can be the female equivalent of a man pushing the back of a woman’s head.
Stick to the traditional pose of her on her back while you lie between her legs. It’s relaxing for her, she doesn’t feel exposed and she can concentrate/fantasise/recite the alphabet do whatever it takes to get there. Put a pillow under her bum and one under your chest to make things a bit more comfy.
She’s begging for it
She stands, you kneel in front of her. Perfect for urgent sex plus it appeals to alpha females who like seeing you shamelessly submissive in front of them. If she goes weak at the knees, literally, and can’t stand any longer – or can’t orgasm standing up (some can’t) – get her to lean against a wall or pull her to the floor to continue. Another good position for confident girls: Get her on all fours on the bed, then simply slide in underneath, putting your head on pillows so you can reach.
You want to impress
Lie on your back on the bed with your head hanging over the edge and get her to straddle your mouth. Or start in the traditional pose of you between her legs, then get up on your knees and lift her legs so her ankles are on your shoulders, before continuing the job. Another hot favourite: bend her over the sofa, face down, and get her to spread her legs then lick from behind. You do need a tongue like a lizard to get there but if you shift around enough, it’s do-able.
DOING IT TO HIM
He takes ages
He stands, legs spread and with a wall behind him in case he wants to lean as things heat up. You kneel on some pillows before him. It’s the classic porn pose so he’ll have masturbated to it many times, speeding up the orgasm. You also appear to be worshipping the part he clearly does as well. Hot it up further by doing it completely naked while he’s clothed (albeit trousers unzipped). Or he’s naked and you’re completely clothed. This also allows good access to his scrotum, perineum and anus – and stimulating any or all of these is just what you need to push him over the edge.
He takes over
Tie him up so he has no choice but to let you be the boss. If he’s straight, it lets him let go of the ‘I should be the one doing everything to her’ thing. You’re in control, which also means no pushing of heads or him thrusting in your mouth.
Bless! Get him to kneel on the bed, at the head of the mattress with his back to the wall. You spread out stomach-down the length of the bed. Any self-consciousness will disappear as he’s treated to the view of your back, bottom and legs before him. A traditional you-or-he-on-top 69er is also worth a bash because there’s no chance of eye contact but it is quite in-your-face (literally), so be guided by his personality.
He’s begging for it
Get primal. Either drop to your knees (as above) or spread his legs and arms on the bed. You’re facing his feet. Use your feet to pin down his wrists and put your hands on his thighs – both for support and to play dominatrix. You’ll only have your tongue free but if he’s that turned on, that’s all you’ll need in this position.
You want to impress
Do it in semi-public, even if just for five or 10 precious seconds. A bit of playful exhibitionism gets instant admiration. If you really, really want to score points, lie back on the bed with your head hanging over the edge of the bed. This is the position used to ‘deep throat’. The idea is to align your throat so it’s in one long straight line then concentrate on completely relaxing the muscles. Inhale through your nose as he enters your mouth. Exhale as you slide him in deep. If you get the urge to gag, swallow and it should disappear. (Practise on a carrot or dildo first). Now, we all know deep-throating – taking him as far as possible into your mouth – is a gimmick. (Most of the nerves are in the head, not the shaft.) But it’s very porny and makes you appear utterly uninhibited and terribly experienced. If, indeed, this is the impression you want to give. If not stick to the public unzip and dip instead.